Hi there.

 It’s been awhile, a very long while. I am writing you this as I feel it’s something well over due, and you deserve to hear this. First off, I am truly hoping this letter finds you well. What I did to you is not fair. It’s not okay. I am sorry to have put you though all of this. You are too good of a man to have had to feel what I’ve made you endure. I didn’t leave you because you’re a bad man. I didn’t leave you because I thought you were un-worthy of love. I left because I knew we both deserved to be happy, and genuinely, at that. People change. Feelings change. It doesn’t mean that the love once shared wasn’t true or real. It simply means that sometimes when people grow, they grow apart. Life is just too short to be anything but blissfully happy and in love.

 It’s time for you to be happy now. Go find your happy. You will. You must know that, don’t you? You deserve to feel that. I don’t want you scratching your head wondering what went wrong, or if you were a good enough man. Don’t allow your mind to run off into that place. We just grew apart. You will make some woman so happy someday. The man you are today, is one whom is very rare, and beautiful. You treated me like a queen, and protected me. I will forever remember that. I just want you happy. During this whole thing, and thru the divorce, it’s all I’ve ever wanted; happiness for BOTH of us. You may not feel that now, but once you do (and you will), you will then know beautiful all over again. Maybe not the same kind, but a different color, or even better. 

 When I left you, I also left behind a beautiful family. I left behind two beautiful parents who gave and still give their kids their all, and have hearts of gold. I left behind a Grandma who spoke kind words to me when I lost a best friend, and then some. I left behind a sister-in-law who I always admired, and is a mother I wish to be someday. I left behind aunts and uncles who made life a little more full of sunshine. I left behind kids who have wonderful talents, and bright futures. Tell your parents I am sorry for causing their son so much hurt. If I won the lottery, you and them are people I won’t forget. I will not forget everything you and your family has all done for me, and all of the ways you all touched my soul and were there for me when no one else was or wanted to be. And for that, you’re all beautiful, and someday, everything is going to be okay. You four are more special than you’ll ever know. 

 During this divorce, I won’t be ugly, nor have I ever wanted to be. I don’t want anything of yours. You will be set free. You will be happy again, and you will find peace. I promise you that. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. Know that the day you find new love, is the day I will smile so big. I know your worth. Now it’s time to move on and find beauty else where. The world is so big and lovely, you’ve got it by the grasp of your finger tips. Don’t worry about me anymore. Just pray for me, and I’ll pray for you. Over the years, you’ve become tired. I’ve watched you grow weak under the weight of disappointment. I’ve witnessed you fight and not be fought for; your heart overflowing & breaking. You were drowning and falling apart. And yet, you smile as if none of this was/is hurting you. But I see you, I notice. It’s that way, isn’t it? I understand it all, I truly do. 

 Have I mentioned that i wish you happiness? And when I say that, I mean true happiness. The kind that we do not find in materialistic things. The kind that isn’t temporary, and lasts only for a few moments. I wish you the kind of happiness your heart craves for. The peaceful, sweet, soft kind. The kind you can sit in silence with, the kind that mends your heart over and over again. The laughter you share with your friends, and that comfort you find in your loved ones; that kind of happiness is the kind I wish for you. I want it to stay with you, and when you feel sadness, I want you to remember that the kind of happiness I want for you is the kind that will find you. I am sorry for causing you this kind of hurt. This is not the end. It is only the beginning for you. I pray that you have the happiest beginning, and so forth. 

 Stay beautiful. 

/// BW