(A cardinal sin sometimes committed by a raw recruit was to take your shovel into a narrow seam 'wrong road round'. You didn't do it twice.)

 

“There’s no bigger, silly bastard undergroun’

A disgrace to thee, ‘is mam an’ ‘is class

‘E took ‘is fuckin’ shovel wrong road roun’.

 

We’d walked back in once t’shotties fired their roun’

An’dep’ty said as we wa’ clear o’ gas

There’s no bigger silly bastard undergroun’.

 

So 27 colliers knelt down

An’ crawled their way through props an’ bars just as

‘E shouts, “Mi fuckin’ shovel’s wrong road roun’”.

 

The fuckin’ pog’s that tight it wain’t turn roun’

There wa’n’t the fuckin’ space to let ‘im pass

There’s no bigger silly bastard undergroun’.

 

At fust we thought we took ‘im fo’ a clown

The silly bastard’s grinnin’ like a lass

 ‘E’d took ‘is fuckin’ shovel wrong road roun’.

 

Twenty fuckin’ minutes out an’ in-bound

That silly twat o’ thine ‘as cost us brass

There’s no bigger silly bastard undergroun’.

‘E took ‘is fuckin’ shovel wrong road roun’.”