It's been about 92 days and it still feels like yesterday the pain beded deep in my veins ,consumed with anger over whelmed  with rejection. My mind clutter with different view points and different angles a lot of assumptions and replaying a lot of tuning out and editing from a factual experience . I spent half of those days crying and the other half repairing , have you ever tried fixing something broken with little to no tools well that's where Im at . I don't know if I am half a reck or just completely totaled out . With the destination in my head I have to keep going even if it's on feet and there aching I have to keep walking bc it's only been 90 something days and I have plenty more to go so I can not allow this other form of pain to cause another road block in my way as I push through I just remember what's 90 days compared to 16 years of rejection, maybe the 90 days just touch the surface of a earthquake or a volcano ready to erupt bc the pain goes so very deep like a weed rooted deep spreading fast over my garden of growth , waiting for the Gardner to pluck them one by one b4 everything beautiful dies , but that takes times witch no one seems to have bc it's going so very fast 92 days flew but the pain still feels so very new .