it’s all kicked off down at the zoo
absolute chaos, a proper to-do
when it all started, it was really quite small
when a boy in a pushchair just squeezed a ball
he didn’t mean to do it, it’s just it was there
all round and pink and covered in hair
they bobbed past him at just the right height
so he grabbed a handful and held them quite tight
he wiggled his fingers and gave them a tweak
the balls stopped bobbing, then followed a squeak
then a yowl of surprise as the pain set in
the boy sensing fun just started to grin
the dog it set off, set off at top speed
it’s owner behind tightly gripping the lead
and holding on with all of his might
the extending lead stopped, the dog took flight
it’s arse overtaking the tip of its nose
clear air being made between ground and its toes
swinging around  in this frenzied arc
was a pissed off dog with a manic bark
it took out two children, an old lady too
and three foreign tourists stood in a queue
a man in a wheelchair swerved out of the way
his luck was in on today of all days
Newton proclaimed what’s up must come down
 and it did with a bump, landing facedown
the dog slipped its lead as it crashed to the ground
in the settling dust lay this poor hound
its tongue hanging out of the side of its mouth
it’s mind casting back to the pain down south
then the dog did as all dogs must do
stuck out its tongue and licked a bollock or two.