Summoned to their verminous den

you're infected with apprehension

(rather than leptospirosis).

Hoping they've ratted you out

they reveal tiny razorsharp teeth

anxious to gnaw rapidly away at

the rewards of much hard work.

 

They torment you with taxes

(thus inciting you to moonlight)

penalising you for putting by.

Gleefully imposing gigantic fines

for simply writing on the wrong line

with no intention of evasion.

 

Sitting at large desks with smug expressions,

beady little eyes alight with malice,

scaly tails hidden beneath swivel chairs,

small grabbing pink paws and twitching

damp pointy snouts ready to sniff out

very minor irregularities or faults

so obviously made in good faith.

 

Even if hour by hour abusing power

Alas! They can't be sacked. Oh no!

Just transferred to infest another nest.

An idle vicious rodent sub-species.

 

Where have all the ratcatchers gone?