long days and distractions
sunglasses reflecting scenes
of caramel-skin boys skipping school
to play stickball in the streets
endless nights punctuated
by the sounds of Cuban heels
tattooed upon our memories
--mementos, like hanging red sunsets
etched in rosegold and tempered steel...
when it all goes bad
like forged passports and spoiled milk
we'll always have Miami...
Thank you for this wonderful imagery and sound. I kept hearing Buena Vista social club playing in the background.
elPintor
Thu 1st Aug 2019 13:49
YES!! D
elPintor
Thu 1st Aug 2019 13:19
elPintor
Thu 1st Aug 2019 11:09
Hi Devon. I hope it won't change your feelings about the line, but I had to change it. I originally considered "spoiled" to be the better choice, but chose to go with "expired" instead. Semantics can be such nasty little bullies when overly weighed in creative writing ;
Dictators--who needs 'em?
Hello David. This all sort of spiralled out from a single point--I didn't have any expectations about where I was headed other than Miami. That said, many ideas similar to those you mention colored my thoughts as I wrote. But, even now, there are too many to put down on paper--I hope that if or when I reread this in the future, I won't forget to revisit them in my memory.
To briefly go down another path...
Over the years, I've had the opportunity to work with, however briefly, many mixed groups having strong contingents of various cultures, ethnicities, and backgrounds. I have always come away from each of these experiences with a feeling of having a greater fortune at their close than when they began. These many different people are like jewels to me, unique and invaluable, and I am made all the more rich for their presence in my life.
Thanks, Ray. I'll admit that the only prior reference I had to Graham Greene was the role his short story, "The Destructors", played in DONNIE DARKO. But, I've recently found a bookstore with a good selection of English-print books through whom I hope to gain access to some much desired hard copy.
Thanks, all, for reading.
Rachel
I love the scant and powerful symmetry and sculpting of the writing Rachel, there's a sort of honour in it that reminds me of Graham Greene.
Ray
Devon Brock
Mon 29th Jul 2019 21:24
"when it all goes bad
like forged passports and expired milk". delicious.
D
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elPintor
Sat 3rd Aug 2019 11:13
Right on, Adam. And, Buena Vista SC is sublime )
Rachel