Shoo,
go away.
I only want young, thin, pretty girls
to look my way.
I don't care if they have anything
intelligent to say.
I just want them to ooh and awe
at my game.
Of course I have no shame,
my past is to blame.
Yes, this dance could drive
the thinker insane.
So, leave with your dignity,
while I toss back another one,
and twirl my ring.
# # #
dance dignity shame respect discrimination life love misogyny narcissism relationships the past
Thank you Tom! I toiled on those last three lines for hours and changed them several times. I’m glad the ones I settled on work well enough to earn some feedback. I appreciate you reading and taking the time to comment. ?
I really enjoyed this, particularly the last 3 lines. It's quiet but feels very assured and firm. Really nicely judged.
Lisa's comment made me laugh too. ?
I believe all men over the age of 40 need to stay away from the much younger crowds. .
They really need a woman who knows the signs of a possible stroke ???
No good having your money taking for sweets and nights out with there pals, while there is a chance of them making fun of you when you make that funny face ???
Ooppps: bet they wish they kept there wife ..
I agree Lisa❣️
Art is a wonderful salve
Thanks Keith. I appreciate your feedback. Poems that cut deep often look blue (cathartic) to the author, but red (flippant) to others. I believe a poet's work is in airing the wound so it can heal.
As I finished reading this unusual poem the word "flippant" came to mind. I do like the words, "of course I have no shame, my past is to blame".
enjoyed this and thanks
Keith
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victoriavautaw@gmail.com
Sat 14th Sep 2019 03:56
Lisa D, your comment made me laugh out loud. Thanks for reading and sharing your beautiful sense of humor. I thought about deleting this poem a few times, but I’m glad I didn’t because your comment, while funny reveals a deeper truth. No less than five guys I know came to mind as I wrote this poem including my estranged husband! I don’t understand love that is only skin deep. I suppose it is more about fears and insecurities.