humour (Remove filter)
Rzhepiks (something funny)
And in the refrigerator at night
Food is more useful and right
***
Nothing is forever under the star
Started my doctor from afar
***
About alcohol - I know my norm as such
But I can’t drink so much
***
You are very chained by brain
Let me loosen the chain
***
Olga's heart is made of ...
Tuesday 25th April 2017 7:29 pm
Smart Little Johnny
This story happened in one school
But … for God’s sake, keep cool,
it can't be taken as a rule.
Once when a teacher of math fell sick
A teacher of physical education came, named Nick.
He wanted to show how intelligent he is,
So he said: Solve my problem please!
-A car moves at a high speed.
To go to Spain a plane I need.
Can you tell me my age
If I read a book on the last page,
a pea...
Thursday 27th August 2015 3:03 pm
Smart Little Johnny
This story happened in one school
But … for God’s sake, keep cool,
it can't be taken as a rule.
Once when a teacher of math fell sick
A teacher of physical education came, named Nick.
He wanted to show how intelligent he is,
So he said: Solve my problem please!
-A car moves at a high speed.
To go to Spain a plane I need.
Can you tell me my age
If I read a book on the last page,
a pea...
Thursday 27th August 2015 3:03 pm
Smart Little Johnny
This story happened in one school
But … for God’s sake, keep cool,
it can't be taken as a rule.
Once when a teacher of math fell sick
A teacher of physical education came, named Nick.
He wanted to show how intelligent he is,
So he said: Solve my problem please!
-A car moves at a high speed.
To go to Spain a plane I need.
Can you tell me my age
If I read a book on the last page,
a pea...
Thursday 27th August 2015 3:03 pm
Humor
Humor
After drinking whisky
Some men are so frisky,
But some are so boring,
All night snoring.
***
I will not give up drinking
But I will go on thinking
If I should give up smoking
***
It’s so difficult to be kind
When all around are blind
***
She has found a coin in her bed.
It was pleasant to know
That someone wants to come back.
***
Yesterday was early,
Tomorrow will be lat...
Monday 10th August 2015 3:27 pm
Humor
Humor
After drinking whisky
Some men are so frisky,
But some are so boring,
All night snoring.
***
I will not give up drinking
But I will go on thinking
If I should give up smoking
***
It’s so difficult to be kind
When all around are blind
***
She has found a coin in her bed.
It was pleasant to know
That someone wants to come back.
***
Yesterday was early,
Tomorrow will be lat...
Monday 10th August 2015 3:23 pm
No, I Am Not!
Answering the question if she is friendly with alcohol,
she replied honestly:
No, I am not.
But the relationship I support.
Saturday 8th February 2014 2:00 pm
Rzhepicks 2013
No matter who,
No matter where,
No matter when,
It only matters why and what for.
***
Yesterday was early,
Tomorrow will be late,
Today I have no time.
***
You can’t train in a gym?
You want to look young and slim?
Stay close to the old ones and fat.
There are many ways to skin a cat.
***
Sometimes I think:
Her...
Wednesday 9th January 2013 7:31 am
haiku
Went to treat my nerves
Will come back in the morning
Drunk tender horny
Larisa Rzhepishevska
Thursday 15th November 2012 8:04 pm
I Am Unique
I couldn't become the best.
I couldn't become worse than all.
I couldn't become as the rest.
So? What is left?
Yes, my dear friend Nick!
You have to know that…
I am unique! :)))
©Larisa Rzhepishevska (Odessa, Ukraine)
The 16th of September, 2012
Sunday 16th September 2012 4:35 pm
That's My Odessa
Odessa.
Early morning.
Sonia is yawning.
Her dressing gown is satiny.
This night was just a symphony
in a company of her Antonie.
She was sure he was her destiny.
All they did was in such a harmony.
With those thoughts she went to the balcony.
But … suddenly she has heard a noise.
It sounded with an irony.
It was her neighbor’s voice.
L...Monday 10th September 2012 10:31 pm
My Only Love
I feel so bad without you,
All my dreams are about you.
I lie in bed, thinking of only you.
You are my dearest and nearest,
The only one and sweetest.
Out of all you are the greatest.
You are so delicate and good
You quickly change my mood.
Your love I prefer to any food.
I love you so much, my darling.
You always look so charming,
...Sunday 1st April 2012 12:11 pm
From the Dating Site
I am tall one when on the hills.
Kind one if he my life fulfils.
Would like some battles with him .,,, but…
Only in case if he doesn't destroy my skills.
©Larisa Rzhepishevska (Odessa, Ukraine)
The 13th of February, 2012
Monday 13th February 2012 6:01 pm
Rzhepicks
I am smarter than all but it’s not noticeable. Want someone who wants me. Hippopotamus – there are so many nice sounds. Under the coat was a goat. It was sunny and funny in bed with my dearest lad. Control shot has changed a lot. A sad glance. Are you my last chance? The dream was such a charm! But the noise of the alarm…! Feet prevented...
Sunday 15th January 2012 8:49 am
The First, The Second, The Third
The first: I went to bed with your wife.
The second: How do you like the first?
The third: She wants to stay with me.
-The first: I don’t live with my wife.
The second: She has AIDS.
The third: How do you like the second?
Do you think that
A toilet bowl is just a hole
For your feces
Or for your ass?
It can be a place for your face...
Wednesday 30th November 2011 4:49 pm
Rzhepicks
May be I am not as strong as it seems to be,
But I am not as weak as someone wants me to be.
It’s not the question of whom to marry,
It’s the question what to do with the rest:
Gary. Larry, Barry, Jerry……
A drunken man shouted as his voice allowed:
Where am I? I feel like to cry!
You are in Soho square if to be ...
Saturday 29th October 2011 6:08 pm
To Be Or Not To Be?
To be or not to be on diet?
That is the question!
I think I won’t.
I better prefer an entrecote.
I certainly love to eat,
My favorite dishes are so sweet.
I never ignore a cake.
How delicious is a juicy steak.
Sandwiches with caviar,
Spaghetti and meatballs,
Pilaf and goulash,
Cucumbers and fish …..
Why should I lose weight?
To eat is ne...
Friday 1st April 2011 10:25 am
Rzhepicks
Time flies so fast!
It’s a pity
you are leaving
at last!
***
If you don’t believe in love at first sight
look at me once more from another side,
I hope you’ll see something to adore.
***
I am thinking to give up drinking.
But how can I do that?
I am in the greatest fear
as beer costs less than milk.
Isn’t it t...
Sunday 13th February 2011 6:05 pm
RZHEPICKS
If you have nothing to say keep quiet,
If you have nothing to show you are retired.
***
Everyone could be much wiser
If that one would find a sympathizer.
***
Any plan without intent –
The essence of a content.
***
Her conscience is so transparent and clean
That it w...
Friday 28th January 2011 6:36 am
RZHEPICKS
Buy this watches
With diamond blotches!
They are like Swiss made.
Ok! Here are dollars hand made.
***
Reading his emails
I imagined a prince from tales.
But …when we met
Without any regret
I told him frankly
When he looked at me blankly:
Farewell, my dream!
We can’t be in one team.
***
-You are a ...
Friday 21st January 2011 4:58 am
RZHEPICKS
The one who laughs the last
Don’t understand the joke so fast.
***
You are so fashionable
And I am not profitable.
***
I sell watches.
For the one who watches watches
50 dollars per hour.
For the one who buys
30 dollars with a prize.
***
He is richer than me for 10 years.
...
Tuesday 18th January 2011 6:36 am
RZHEPICKS
Do not protest!
As it’s the best!
After doing nothing
To have a good rest.
***
A soul wants a picture,
An ass - an adventure.
***
I am always polite,
And think I am right.
When I send him to hell
I always recall and ask
If he is well.
***
There is something absolutely English
In t...
Monday 17th January 2011 6:39 pm
RZHEPICKS
They say: Time is money.
I have a lot of time
But…have no money.
***
If you don’t have enough money
You better don’t call her
You are my honey.
***
I am looking for a husband and a friend.
If they come together I’ll withstand.
***
You’ve come – Thank you!
You’ve left – Thank you very much!
...
Friday 14th January 2011 6:43 pm
Rzhepicks
Mirror is the means of communication
and good relations
with the one you love.
***
Better to be smart and sometimes dull
than dull but sometimes smart.
***
If she says ‘no’
it means she wants just to talk.
If she says ‘yes’
it means she wants a long walk,
without any talk
But….. with a good f…
***
...Wednesday 17th November 2010 4:56 pm
I Am Laura's Stomach
It’s Monday morning, she’s got up.
When I asked her for breakfast
she told me to shut up.
When I asked her for my porridge
or at least for an orange
she told me to keep quiet
as from today she was on diet.
She has noticed cellulite
and decided to get rid of it.
In the day time it was a real crime,
she didn’t put anything inside me,
...
Sunday 5th September 2010 6:10 pm
I Learn And Study English
- Let’s start from the very beginning!
- Ok, I know, it’s a very good place to start.
- If you want to know how to read
you have to learn the alphabet.
As far as we are not in a race
you can face 26 letters in one phrase.
“The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog”.
Now we’ll have some dialogue.
You’ll see how new words appear,
I hope everything will...
Saturday 21st August 2010 8:16 am
Humour
Some men are so energetic,
Earn money working hard.
Their words are so poetic,
That’s what you regard.
But...after drinking alcohol
They become worse a bull,
They behave like a monkey,
They spend money like a donkey.
A woman who drives a car at night
Can shine as the moonlight.
You will notice her by all means.
...
Saturday 5th June 2010 1:50 pm
I am on diet
I’ll put on diet my fattish ass
So that the doorway I could pass.
I’ll do some exercises to lose weight
As fat asses I just hate.
I would like to look a model of super class
Or may be like a slander lass.
I know it’s too bad to amass fat,
But…while rhyming this couplet
I am looking at an apple pie
And a big saliva appears in my eye.
Friday 14th May 2010 2:27 pm
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