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Tags from last 12 months

living with addiction (1) pain (1)

Feeling Blue

It feels like doom and salt being rubbed into the shrapnel wounds of a broken heart

It feels like that sinking feeling in your stomach, sinking further still, until your drowning in your own guilt and misery

It feels like a heavy chest and gasping for air, each breath an attempt to regain some composure

It feels like teary eyes, and that sting, the gulp, just before you cry

It feels li...

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Turbulent Love Affair

I hate you, you’re a serpent. You’re suffocating! Draining me of life!

I love you, you’re an angel. Lifting me to my highest heights..

Get away from me, you liar! I know your intentions, you’re not fooling me!

Come here, my hero. You’ll protect me from every wrong there will ever be.

Your touch make me nauseous; the neediness makes me sick

I fantasize about your body, lips, eyes, sm...

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My Interpretation

When it is selfishness and greed, it is not love.

For love, is the want, the need to give your all and everything to someone else; even if it means going with out yourself.

When it is harsh words and actions, it is not love.

For love, is never wanting to see the one your heart beats for in pain and suffering. When it is shaming, using and destroying, it is not love.

For love, builds, n...

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The Gold and The Blue

I sit here and ponder, why do I have all the gold and feel still, so damn blue.

I sit here and wonder, why he says he loves me, but I still hold it untrue.

I sit here and criticise myself, himself and everyone around for things that may or may not be.

I sit here and justify, my own thinking to me.

I stand there and think, about a million things and nothing at all..

I pace up and dow...

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My ills

It's 10.30 in the morning and I'm throwing up on the bathroom floor
Having drowned the person who I was before
All the drinking, drugging, lying, spending
Arriving very early for the doom impending

How did I get here, how did I lose control?
Waking up in fear and pain, drawing my first shot at 4
To stop the shakes and silence the anxiety
Once again becoming a liability in my society

Wh...

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living with addictionpain

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