humour (Remove filter)
The Transcendentalist
So the scents of pre cornflake sex
And post energy drink breath
Pervades the carriage like a squid squadron infusion..
Acrid lemon bleach musk cologne
Tinkly-plink-thud beats effervesce from earphones
She leans arching on the glass pane knackered
Eye-liner Rothko remastered
Her groin marine satyr
Not so lucky a bastard
She receives a sext from another torpedo piece of spam with pecs
Ni...
Tuesday 27th September 2016 7:02 pm
Meanwhile, In Sweden
Human resources -
She works in human resources.
Don't tell anyone.
Sometimes I hear those screams from her basement;
Screams like giving birth to a fully grown and functioning dentist.
Then, after the screams,
There's that familiar matryoshka doll silence.
The crooked blood leaks from her sleek harbinger mouth,
As she carries the sleek heavy-duty plastic refuse bags,
One by one,
To...
Saturday 17th September 2016 6:53 pm
Tycho (Deviationist Astronaut And The Zany Karmic Architect)
I'm rushing below the firmament in a submarine
Pulled up by balloons
Rocket thrusters won't work in a vacuum
The torrid plasma liquid washes over the viewing screen
And the Hubble telescope cannot anywhere be seen
This periscope doesn't recognise the space handed to us it seems..
Am I floating beneath the epidermis of a prison planet scheme
I fear this is way beyond my theosophical steam
...
Monday 29th August 2016 11:39 am
I Had To Write This Poem
I had to write this poem
because I thought of this one great line,
What do you think -
will it stand the test of time?
Well, I had to write it down
to deter other poets stealing this idea;
You know lines are clutched from the atmosphere,
Or they fall like apples, spill over like beer.
I had to write this poem,
Because I thought of this one great line;
Like a beat messiah,
My acid m...
Saturday 20th August 2016 4:03 pm
Duty Of Care - Extreme Combat
Dear all
Please take this refresher advice as a friendly reminder
Of our protocol for calling in sick
Which is
In the first instance call the shift supervisor
Inform them why you are unable to attend your shift
Be as clear as possible
The more information the better
We don't need to hear a blues lyric
Only the truth
This information will of course remain ...
Friday 12th August 2016 1:23 pm
In-Love Doggerel
You're a starship powered on Xanadu nectar;
I'm a pogo stick on coal.
You're a majestic arc of the milky way;
I'm a quark in an unsold cheese roll.
Your eyes launch songbirds and sonnets;
Come fly with me on my crackling comet.
Your hair evokes the erotic scents of perfumed night bazaars;
I exude burning tyres on torched, smashed deisel cars.
Beside you a pulsar is like a sorry matchstic...
Thursday 4th August 2016 8:30 am
Poem of the Week
(Inspired by Write Out Loud's discussion thread: Poem of the Week)
So
This week
It can be announced Gong-Ka-Bong
That this poem
Is Poem of the Week
Art
Love
And a celebration of the communing with our etheric higher sense
Amen
So
Let us join together
And let the blood-letting commence
Observe the cowering bastards sit on the fence
Poets can be a vicious breed
Almost as obnoxiou...
Saturday 9th July 2016 9:43 am
Forest Gate Mystery Train (Spoken Word)
I'm on the Forest Gate Mystery Train,
With my burgled geranium eyes.
I'm on the Forest Gate Mystery Train,
Sighing goldfish clock sardine spies.
Spammed atomic; trolleyed marine,
Frost-buckled arms glow margarine,
Slender dolls slalom offside knees,
Capsules backslide into the stalagmite City.
Tutankhamen consortia;
Shoulder-penguins soggy cadge the dap...
Wednesday 15th June 2016 4:04 am
You Should Have Been Here Yesterday (Copenhagen Unicorns And Stockholm Starfish)
You should have been here yesterday
Ten thousand flamingos danced all over the square
A bouquet of jasmine blooms filled the air
Golden geese spiralled a mid-air fanfare
Peace doves gently dropped ribbon boxes of chocolate eclairs
You should have been here yesterday
Billionaires gave away their mansions and wares
Rare paintings
and rare cars
with fre...
Friday 20th May 2016 2:13 pm
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