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Rose Rhia

Updated: 2 days ago

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Biography

i like writing poetry and songs.

anxiety all my life

anxiety is a colour and its all really black i feel it in my chest and i feel it in my back tension in my shoulders and pain in neck sometimes it feels like ill never smile again but then i remember the little girl i once was who would go out their way to make everyone laugh anxiety is a colour and it seems really dark maybe dark green but its not a good start its not a colour you would wish on your friends because it can really drive you round the bend ive had some people i knew that took their own lives its sad that the black never did rise so when i feel anxious i take a little stroll i go to the sauna, might eat a jam roll all this black feeling sometimes consumes, but when it gets lifted i feel out of the blue all of these colours to signify the sweaty palms the sleepless nights when will this end i ask myself she can't reply its like shes in a spell a spell of anxious thoughts ruminating creating stories in her mind that are mistaken anxious in my belly anxious in my mind when i got older i realised ive been anxious all my life expressed and confused all of my emotions now i realise its all energy in motion i used to get angry and put up a good fight would get kicked out of school and my mum would mind! have to come pick me up at the age of 5 she was not happy to have to a child like mine grounded i would be or maybe even smacked but she never realised the adhd i had mental health wasnt her priority she didnt really know all she knew was to work and go go go all these anxious thoughts manifesting in ways but now i have a toolbox to get me through these days i love helping people who feel the same way fluttery chest prickly skin feeling hot in bed they say all these thoughts running through my mind its like i have 1000 tabs open online so sometimes i try to cancel them all but sometimes i still struggle to fall into a deep sleep i drink my herbal tea because i know, its good for me and i stopped smoking all that weed and started planting healthy seeds in my garden and in my mind now i feel the anxiety rise this is like the test of time please oh please stop polluting up your mind.

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