Hooray, my gym is to reopen at long last

I need some excuses and I need them fast

Four months of slacking and not working out

It's going to be hell on earth, there is no doubt

 

Lift the lightest weights I will groan under strain

Can it really ever be worth the torture and pain

Kettlebells, dumbells, deadlift the weighted bar

Spinning on those bikes, never gets me very far

 

Perfect toned bodies, painted faces and smiles

Pounding on the treadmill for hours and miles

Frantic peddling on cycles both static and spin

A battle for health and fitness, will I ever win

 

Stepping on the stepper but I never reach the top

The cross trainer step, push and pull until I drop

Row, row my rower “merrily” as fast as I can

You'll find me in corner, right in front of the fan

 

I do like my classes, HIT, step, tone and insanity

I think perhaps that last one was named after me

Music will be blaring the instructor will be chanting

I will be at the back, red faced, puffing and panting

 

I am genuinely pleased the gym will reopen soon

I can not wait to get back, I will be over the moon

I'll be there bright and early just you wait and see

I can't think of anywhere I would rather be....

What's that, did I hear someone mention afternoon tea