surfing
the sea sucks to the leeward side
a subconscious urge
a gut-tug
saving lives is automated now
with gravely klaxons bleeping
red buggies on the beach
loudspeaker warnings
and a jet ski throbbing
such a tiny strip of sand
is safe
like one inch marked
on a ruler
we all start here in the safety zone
then slowly we get dragged across
seduced by the rip
as we begin, womb-tied
yet some are swept away
a few sucked under
and gone from view
lost to sight
around the monumental headland
image - PinCheck
Ray Miller
Mon 19th Jul 2010 15:36
Hello Ann. You've some great phrases in this - gut-tug, womb-tied and the 3rd verse." gravely klaxons" is a bit of a mystery to me and I'd have liked something more powerful at the end. Enjoyed.