The terrors that mens’ prostates hold

Are troublesome and many fold

Retention, Urgency, Weak Stream

You grey-haired blokes know what these mean

But I shall concentrate upon

From all these aspects just on one

You’ve seen it takes us old blokes longer

To take a wazz than when we’re younger

Which is why to take a piss

We now no longer stand like this

But like the ladies we sit down

For yellow now and not just brown

So by this action while we’re sat

It stops us pissing on the mat

It isn’t that we’re all to blame

Cos forward’s where we try to aim

But “forwards” these days is at best

From East-North-East to West-North-West.