What happens if Terry the giant does

not touch wood what would Sally say…

but still he drinks his ever so nice tea.

 

What would happen if Father Christmas didn’t

stop drinking Jack Daniels throughout the rest

of the year?

 

Drunken Santa is crashing through the snow

You’re all on the naughty list

 

Pensioners too cold to take a stand

munch a million bags of Monster Munch

while a child sleeps peacefully.

 

Unlucky gifts from unreal Santas;

unfortunate poultry the stars of the show.

To sail us all into a storm of our own making

Best not to know, leave innocence in peace

 

I’m going to get the tram or beeline to the

Hive, to tell them my good news, Honey,

I’m buzzin’.

 

Whatever happened to Nasty Jack?

 

Trump shouts “Fake Santa”, as Santa

is shown coming into court, charged with

patent breaches on all the toys he made.

 

Promises like dust in the wind subside.