Struck again but not struck off

What I'm looking for is some real time off

Most creatures search for peace

But what I want is to be left alone in peices

 

That impact was a pitiful graze leaving me in dissaray

But still alive am I, to my dismay

Many lives have I now lived, first human, now to this

A never ending cycle of living unless I can get one last hit

 

What did I do to endure such a living agony?

Preyed upon by hope of death, such fallacy!

Every morning I creep out, tip toeing to leap to my destiny

But self awareness is not a gift but a test of me

 

Sitting here on the side of the road contemplating my death

I wonder how it will come, quickly, excrutiatingly or prolonged?

But I really don't care at this point in time

As long as it's right and as long as it's mine