What were you like

When you were alive?

What did you do

When you were breathing?

Would I have seen you?

Would I have scared you?

Would you scare me?

Would you still be here?

What would of happened

When things went differently?

When we could both breath

When did we breathe in time?

Were we ever both there 

With the same air?

Were we ever both alive?

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When we die,

We'll be forgotten,

But what can we say when

We're forgotten

While alive?

What am I to think

When I am invisible?

When I am cast aside?

When I am the problem?

Who is there to see me for me?

Does death then hold no meaning?

Is death even worth fearing?

Or is it rather embraced

As a means of escape

From those who

Don't care

At all?

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Can tell
Give me your heart, you lied from the start 
Looked in ya eyes ain what you want 
I can telll James got ya heart 
That’s who you wanted it from the start 
Cut me off, youn wanna talk 
Let me die you could just walk 
Really had the key into my heart 
Why you wanna do me this when I’m soft 
Hurt 
All in my thoughts 
Left me dying, now it’s my fault 
Crying 
Lonely in a empty lo...

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an epitaph
covered in overgrown grass
numbers and a letter encrypted,
written to the deceased,
for only those who knew him
you’d truly understand

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From the lover you'll never know

A note scribbled down in tears

sits atop a mound of colour

Trying to work out these forgotten fears

From a family torn and lost

Flowers that soon will rot

Your teddy sits upon the mound, arms wide open

Melting, muddy and forgotten

For the journey now cut short

With an ending some had thought

If only you could see things

How b...

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I don't have the vocabulary to describe it
because there are no words in any language
that would do it justice

"hopefully we have a very long time before that happens"

it hit me.
im very likely going to spend the last half of my life 
on the outside of what i want,
looking in at what i deserve.
wondering if that will be me next.
will you be in someone elses eyes?
and how that perso...

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The title of my sonnet is inspired by that of the excellent 1995 film, Land and Freedom, directed by eminent film director, Ken Loach, persecuted in the UK and elsewhere for his compassionate socialist views.

With reference to my last six lines: the terrorist murder in 1946 of British soldiers, of Jews and others should not be forgotten in the rush to attempt to justify the seven-decades-long ...

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atlas
echoes to the waters edge,
no fractured beauty in the
luminous lost in love.
from ridge
to crest
to flume, 
the olive in my skin
flutters.
veins
rust,
ripple,
and glimmer.
this deadened
parcel
coppers. 
dock your heart to mine
as we expire,
muted.

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As I wake up flat on my back

in an unfamiliar bed,

surrounded by hazy faces

and teary eyes,

and wobbly smiles,

I find that I cannot

for the life of me

remember who and why

they are here for this old guy.

A figure clad in black, too,

stands right there at the door.

I don't know why they won't come in

or why they're being ignored.

Perhaps, I think,

they...

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to grieve is to know love intimately.

to pluck his voice from a crowd,
though I've not heard it in years.
to reminisce about my fingertips
reading his calloused hands like braille
and finding my next breath in every tactile.

to recognize any morsel of his being
in any dimension
and pledging patience to the search
in every lifetime.
to finding him.
and knowing he is ever present.

...

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binding my roots to the earth 

is a sacred therapy.

my soul recognizes it

as muscle memory.

this holy walk on eternal plank,

brushing elbows with the grey

while i claw to escape my skin.

a draw of breath into infinite abdication,

bleeding out in memory.

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I was ready made for grief.

to live an ode to a common thing,
     this elegy to peace.

and on the days that I feel nothing,
     I torment the stillness behind my eyes
because feeling is proof of living.
and I so badly want to be alive.
     to dig deep in the scar garden,
     to excavate my hollow pit,
     to sow a lifetime of memories
     of being just out of reach.

it is my...

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“The pen is mightier than the sword”, it’s said,

But bitter and twisted gobs on sticks stir shit;

Mendacity’s their stock in trade; love’s bled

To death by sabre-rattling hypocrites.

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Dear Friends and family members

Gathered here to celebrate

And rake over my life’s embers

So sorry that I’m late

I intended to be on time

For this, the concluding event

Commemorating in songs and rhyme

A life well spent

Only the traffic lights were down

And it just kept getting worse

With anxious mothers on the school run

Stuck behind the funeral hearse

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Did I hit my head or have a fall?

Did my heart give out?

Am I under the stars?

Did I make it to heaven?

The memories I have are as strong as an over perked cup of coffee

I can’t forget or let them go

In fear that I’ll feel I’ll have never lived those moments to remember

I try to recreate those memories

I try to relive every moment

But each time I do

I realize it’s not...

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When I close my eyes I see the sun rising over the ocean. I see a succession of cars. I hear you laugh. I see knives in the flesh. I see fireflies surrounding your body. I see endless trees and a forest I have never known. I see barbells and birds. Lots of birds. I see the moment you decided to give up, I see you vomiting in the toilet after taking the pills.  I see you telling me you thought the ...

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Hand reach into my throat,

clawing their way to my heart.

Red blooms under their attention,

as they slither through this maze

of veins and vessels.

Slick hands grab ahold of my still heart,

squeezing it manually.

Once, twice, thrice,

a soothing rhythm in a space,

long devoid of music.

Yet, no amount of squeezing

is enough to make my heart start beating.

No amoun...

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My grandparents names stand in front of me

Hundreds of yards away from each other, neighborly

They were always a city away,

But now so close for eternity.

There with the named and the nameless,

Where so many lives remain only in memory.

There was wind blowing in the trees,

Sun beating down upon our face,

Some of us walked on,

Some of us stayed.

Flowers ...

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Every loss is felt

Just as a ripple is spelt in water

Ever decreasing, calming asunder

A clock ticks in a house even emptier than before

The dark lingers in a hall still and sure

The cat rules now

Wondering why and how

Water weeps from a pungent wound

Never to be cleaned but to neglect and fester

Such a thought no beautiful sight could hinder

Leaving the los...

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Mother nature painted you by hand

Blue swirls traced along your land

A wonderous heaven lost to nature

May you still yet hopefully have a future?

You sway innocently in a dead void

Whille your cost of living is toiled

The aliens still infect you

Spewing out the innocence that held you

You are a blue green marble

A child's tale, a cherished fable

But waiting ...

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Death transcends the toll of time.

Stands beneath a smoke-filled sky.

Spirits rise up from the past,

row by row from first to last.

Like silhouettes of lifeless trees

against the sun, no foot can flee.

Then sink they into desert sand…

as hate consumes the life of man.

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What is a day but a measure in time 

don’t you hear your own clock chime 

You might think it's not so simple 

So refuse to act on this impulse 

just to think of what others may say 

But now is the time to seize the Day 

Your future is earths worm food

For our life can’t be renewed 

Our ashes will be left behind 

That's how it's all designed 

So live the life you ...

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Those who do not accept death

are its only real victims 

For one does not feel the current 

until he begins to swim against it

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I wish it would have been a war

that was the explanation for

the reason you are not around,

the reason I don’t hear the sound

of your voice anymore.

No, I don’t hear it anymore.

And I wish it were all a dream

although a bad one it would seem,

cuz then at least I’d have the chance

to open up my eyes and glance

upon your face, but I don’t see it.

No, not anymo...

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I sat today midst the happy smiles

of a children’s song, and for just a while

I was happy too, for what else should come

from a happy day and a happy song.

But, it came again just like every June,

when I feel the pain of an open wound

that on every other day I keep

hidden far from view, buried oh so deep.

But I guess that’s why they made the day,

so that folks ...

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Darkness shrouds the train

Blue flashes flicker in the rain

Alone with strangers left to hide

As a man lies down on the line

Time stands still when death enters

The breath becomes hard to centre

My luck at catching the last train

Becomes silence in the rain

Everyone is on the line

Phones in hand, not the time

Words turn inwards

Soiled and sinful 

...

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“Made in Britain”, once a mark of highest quality,

To Gaza, with love, we send white-hot death from above,

Cruel Britannia stoops to utter depravity.  

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Doomsday

Grey clouds roll in

The Sun sets in

Long ago was the summer of smiles

Now dark brooding anguish riles

Only the forgotten battlefields remember

The light green and the fond Heather

While with winds kiss

The clock winds and begins to hiss

The ticking is louder than ever now

As we wind our lives further down

While far away the threat is real

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Today my friend buries her mother in a coffin she has painted by hand. Today my friend's father tells her that she has taken on too much responsibility in the matter. She tells me he made her feel like she did not have a choice. Today I will get my hair cut. Today by mid day my friend will have buried her mother. My friend is only twenty four. Her daughter is two. I ask my friend how she has been ...

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Watching the leaves fall

Standing so tall

Waiting at the window

I still wonder

It wasn't so long ago

I can still see us

Haunting shadows in the dusk

Running, fighting, climbing

Making footprints in the snow

Your furry figure lingers at the edges of my mind

Gone but not forgotten

Your smile runs to hide

Sunny days fade away

As your ghost lies st...

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Death comes without warning; it steals your life away.

It takes away your loved ones, and the lights of your day.

Death comes silently; it stabs you in the back,

It reaches round behind you, then comes in for the attack

Death comes slowly; it reaches for your throat

It overwhelms you; it chokes you, before you’ve had time to put on your coat.

Death comes quickly, i...

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