This is obviously a very performancy one but I like it so I thought I'd stick it  up here anyway.
 

alex iamb's Big I Thank you

6 months I've been doing this and I've had so much luck
6 months and kind people have helped me so much
6 months and I'm getting gigs without too much fuss
But the narcissist in me says its just not enough
I want money and groupies and dammit – other stuff
I wanna keep lions like rabbits in a fuck-off great hutch
 
I wanna raise an army for world domination
I want to be fed peeled grapes by nubile asians
I wanna gang of thieves, be a modern-day fagin
I wanna squat the whitehouse to throw a rave in
 
I want BBC1 to become channel alex iamb
When I enter a room I want people to stand
I wanna get pushed everywhere in an oversized pram
I wanna crowd surf a sea of celebrity fans
I want an arts council grant of 200 grand
For scratching my balls then sniffing my hand
 
I want carpets of scarlet wherever I roam
I want garlands and fanfares and ridiculous robes
I want to be a prince, or a king or the pope
I want lords to roll spliffs when I fancy a smoke
 
But here's the manic depressive dichotomy
Balancing self-belief with humility
Is hard to do, its not easy
For a bi-polar purveyor of poetry
So I'm sorry if my I am is a little too big
And I'm sorry if my boots would fit better on a kid
But to get myself ready to do the next gig
I have to let myself think like an arrogant git
I have to puff myself up so I don't shrivel and shrink
And I hate myself, hurt myself, call myself shit
When the people have all gone and I've got time to think
 
Did I do that? Did I say that? Am I really that man?
Oh jesus, oh god, oh I did, oh I am
 
But right now I'm standing here in front of you lot
With my big hair, my big head and my bloody great gob
And I'm larger than life, got it all going on
All giggles and grins and words by the ton
And I love it, I won't lie
I live for these lights
This stage and your laughter
And for holding this mic
It swells me, it compels me
To be more than I've been
So this one's for you and for you and you three
Cos without you I'm nothing
Just a silly haircut
with a mouth in the middle
That never shuts up
An armless mime artist
Ken Hom with no wok
A streetfighting man that can't find a ruck
I need you, I feed from you, without you I'm nowt
Just a big bag of wind and some crushing self-doubt
So at this juncture I'd like to take a quick pause
To even things out, to settle some scores
I love you all, you've been wonderful, I couldn't ask for more
So give your good selves a big round of applause