I call you on the telephone

But you're not on the line

It looks as if I'm left alone

And you're no longer mine.

 

I'd send a telegram or two

On them I'd write upon

The words I'd like to say to you

But telegrams have gone.

 

I try to call again - contrite,

And hope you'll answer me

Or was last night our final fight

And love a memory?

 

Forgive this man - please hear my ring

And free me from this fever

When you hear my ting-a-ling

Just pick up your receiver.

 

Success!  You're there - I start to stutter

You put me on the rack

And having left me in the gutter

You suddenly change tack.

 

You whisper how you love me still

And want me for your own

Our lines engaged - a lifetime bill

I stare down at the 'phone.

 

I listen to your marriage plan

With me the chosen one

I'm sorry love, I'm not your man...

I say what's done is done.

 

And now my 'phone rings more and more

But I refuse to heed it

Instead I've locked it in a draw

It'll stay there till I need it!