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Widdendream

He chewed the word
like week old gum
chamming
its mountainous peaks and troughs

a wiped clean credit card
poked a plastic shark fin
from the crocodile bubbled wallet
gaping in his palm

he was just confused
but he needed
a long word
to picture the beach

one that drew out the blade
from his dead friend
spilling red
through the pebbles

one to navigate the dot dot
Pollock spots chasing dark swirls across his spray burst
give away t-shirt

◄ Foundations

Comments

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Michael Scott

Wed 1st Feb 2012 11:05

Chamming = chewing in a loud and annoying way x

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Michael Scott

Wed 1st Feb 2012 11:00

Thanks Ray, Spot on. On every count.

M

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Ray Miller

Wed 1st Feb 2012 10:02

Enjoyed the poem. Had to look up Widdendream and chamming(though I still don't know what you mean by it). Last 2 verses are startling, in a good way. I'm going to assume that the long line
Pollock spots chasing dark swirls across his spray burst

was a mistake and you really meant

Pollock spots chasing dark swirls
across his spray burst

The weak part is this

he was just confused

which doesn't really add a lot



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