They were once "Conservative and Unionist"

But now it's "Con" - you get the gist:

Con-ning us all about the EU,

Con-creting the countryside we once knew,

Unlike the land they won't be missed.

They called themselves "New" Labour,

As if it was a new flavour,

But the "Guilty Party" is what they are

For what they did both near and far,

And I no longer know my neighbour.

As for the Liberal Democrats -

As smug as smiley Cheshire Cats,

They're liberal with our rights and laws

And prefer the view beyond our shores

Self-righteous sell-out prats!