It was all too much on the outside
So easy to slide
Into realms where demons hide
So they take us away so secure
In a van with a Day-Glo door
No sirens scream
And no blood pours out
Nothing tangible
Except the ever-increasing rotting rout
That quarters the mine of the mind
white like bathroom grout

clinical

I shove my fingers in it sometimes.

Here we are all secure
Under the locked door of electronic guardians
closed circuit tv
Key code zones and stamped out Zopiclones
Of doctors
and nurses with no white coats
they wear blue pullovers
And in wings we traipse
In circles straight
And queues
Dragging the burning fuse
We the people you use
We the dirt on paper shoes
We the lost and confused
The temporary stunned
the pilled and the shunned
spanner jammed the works
and the beloved machines don’t spin round


Chemically unkind
Leave me alone so chemically unkind.
you administer

Leave me alone
from chemical facts.
SSRI and DOPAMINE
don’t be mean
your dopamine
(repeat x 2)

leave me alone

you don’t know what your doing

leave me alone

Don’t try to explain
in
Some complex stream some equation
On why in my head, this invasion
Took place.

And reasons
Stacked on reasons
The domain of the brain
a chaotic sound
glued to the ground
the grind and millstone
Of the circular ward
we turn the stone round
flower power
psychotic sounds
the demons
don’t know me anymore

Since your
Green pill

Since your
Blue pill

Since your
White pill

Since your
Monkey trill

May as well be
modern monkeys
rattling our NHS chrome cages

hold on to the hand rail

search for inner strength, gone
rage, calm
gone
in the mental ward
a simple walk
In a simple park, they escort us out
if were good girls and boys
and then bark some
howl
then pinch some jowel, I’m sagging
medication barred park
The nurse bitch bark
And stark
The feelings of the caring ones
Contaminated
our own peers
I see the fear in the visitors
Some have been coming here for years
Forced to change gears of the mind
to adapt to the unstable kind
the hounded
Prisoners on the inside silent
powder kegged
grounded TNT
a chemical
we wait to explode.

A man sites next to me
utters everything
In one sodden trance.
We spill our food and mess our pants
As he rants the ridiculous
The interstellar
Conspicuous
Invasion of aliens
Then we look at ourselves
and wonder who's taken us over


Sinister thoughts, ridiculous rage
they Sectioned me in courts
held their own justice in  here.
a parade
Before 3 doctors
downgrade me
I beg them to let us leave
to the back beat a ticking watch sings
cruelly the days countdown
try not to stray off the grass
shut out
the cackling laugh as our heads hit the cast
the shadow of sleep
rolls in fast
The chemical cosh
The fruit cake squash
The demons don’t know me any more.

We the despairing
You the chemically caring

and the bed
weed the bed
roots
weed
roots
The bed, shoots
the pain
worms, weed
weight gain
burrow, stale
socket
weed
stop it
I’m rooting to it
Routing for it

Wee

The bed
nurse name said ‘Dee’
pill, rout, weed, sleep
speak to me
dignity fed up on plastic sheets
I despise the pleats
mad me calm, tame twee
sweating sheets hate the pleats
arrange your pleats
untied ,going straight
Those ‘it'll never happen to me’
Jacket Elite
all folded

praying for some sleep
it’s a 50/50 bet
im a big fan of Egyptian cotton
but these plastic sheets make me sweat
I hope they let me sleep
I need to get out of here
hope they let me sleep
I got to get out of here
out of here
I have to get out of here
I gotta
gotta get out of here
id like to
they said I may
I gotta get out of here
they don’t let you out of here
I need to get out of here
mum take me out of here
mum
mother?
mum
take me out
those, will they , I gotta
gotta
they….., the sheets
pills
I want to sleep
the ducking plastic pleats
pills
on the sheets
they dressed the sheets
nurse knitted pleats in me
I have to get out of here.

I present my plastic sheets

neatly folded
now can I get out of here?