In the calm of darkness

I find great peace

The whirring of my head begins to cease

 

For in my everyday

I so struggle with just being me

Speaking my wants doesn’t come easily

 

There is conflict

In every decision I make

Trying to act for everyone’s sake

 

Often I forget myself

In that moment I’m not important

As old beliefs still haunt

 

There is a mask

I feel I must wear

For others to want me there

 

The want to have fun

Not to understand my complex feelings

And that is most isolating

 

So as I say farewell

A sense of gladness comes to me

In the simplicity of my own company

 

Here there is not battle

No conflict or fear

I feel safe enough to shed a tear