Cynthia Buell Thomas

Two Formal Poems (re-posts)

by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Tuesday 10th January 2017 12:02 pm (first posted Sunday 2nd August 2015 1:20 pm)

Upon the Winds of Change

Upon the winds of change our courses flew

And us across the heaving seas did send.

It mattered not what dreams each would pursue

For Fate decreed what we could not portend:

That once again our raging hearts should blend

In Youth’s enduring spirit which does flow

Between us still, steel bond of lustful friend

Whose tortured knotting did our strengths bestow.

It did, and does, and will, determine what we know.

(Spenserian Stanza: 9 lines, 3 rhymes in strict structure – ababbcbcc, iambic pentameter - ,/,/,/,/,/ ; line 9 – Alexandrine ,/,/,/,/,/,/)

Hear the faint chimes

Hear the faint chimes, music of nodding bluebells,

Tinkling-glass tones trembling on restless breezes,

Soundless wild blue notes from the woodland shadows.

God ringing prayer bells.

Sapphic stanza: 4 lines, with lines 1, 2, 3 each of 11 syllables (hendecasyllabics), and measured in the same strict feet : /, // /,, /, /, and the 4th prescribed line using 5 syllables as follows : /,, //

In Modern Poetry, used by Algernon Swinburne and Ezra Pound.

Cynthia Buell Thomas

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Comments

M.C. Newberry

Fri 7th Aug 2015 16:44

I particularly enjoyed "Hear The Faint Chimes" - for its
mystical concept of flowers/bells and the lovingly chosen
words that work so well. I can see why you are so
pleased!
I confess to rarely if ever consciously using a known
formal poetic pattern, instead letting an inbuilt rhythm
in my head dictate flow and length. The "mechanics"
- as I think of them - are surely there to be used as
a suitable framework for what is fermenting in the mind.

Harry O'Neill

Tue 4th Aug 2015 22:50

Folks,
How encouraging to see some of the old forms used and investigated for modern possibilities.

Particularly the iambic pentameter which suits our language
so well, and which by hurrying up - or slowing - the syllables
between the beats when reading aloud can sound very modern to the present day ear.

Obviously, the free style rules the roost, but I do think that
we should strive continuously to batter it into some sort of rhythmic order.

John Coopey

Tue 4th Aug 2015 17:44

Thoroughly enjoyed these, Cynthia. The site needs more formalised stuff.
The Spenserian Stanza feels more rhythmically satisfying to me. I think it's the final short line of the Sapphic which stops it being put to bed like the Alexandrine does.
As a minor point (I'm contracted to complain about something!) I never enjoy the use of "did" and "does", which always feel to me like spacers.

Helen Elliott

Mon 3rd Aug 2015 09:55

Cynthia, as you know I love formal poetry and I admire any poet who takes the time to get to grips with it.

Although, I have attempted many forms, most have been written in Iambic Pentameter and the reason for this - well it is a natural instinct for me. I think it is like music, it's an inbuilt thing :) that's why I am drawn to the lyrical Sonnet - 14 IP lines but with the chance to break some rules in the process - I like that.

So what you have produced above is, to me, rather impressive and the fact that it was a labour of love and you have taken the time to tinker with it is wonderful.

In terms of formal v free verse, I can't understand why there is so much debate about it, a good poet is a good poet!! And you without a doubt are a good poet :)

I would LOVE to read a CBT Sonnet!

Stu Buck

Sun 2nd Aug 2015 15:58

i have to admit to being moderately laymonic (if its not a word it should be) regarding metre and verse, having never touched an english class aside from what was deemed necessary. so i have no intellectual input to give on the subject. however...

Tinkling-glass tones trembling on restless breezes

...is just lovely, even to my uncouth lugholes.

Harry O'Neill

Sun 2nd Aug 2015 14:58

Cynthia,
your intelligent wisdom in actually having a go at resurrecting some of the old forms in modern style gave me the courage to post the blog I have done today.

I know it is devilishly difficult to re-create the feel of some of them.

But full marks for trying

Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 2nd Aug 2015 13:32

Helen, this posting is for you especially. I sweat blood over these particular two, through countless revisions - although not recently. I wanted works that could not be discerned as 'modern'. A friend took them both to challenge a poetry group as to their period origins. Unfortunately, I never did hear the outcome.

I am inordinately pleased with them, regardless of how they strike anyone else. It was a labour of love, and respect for earlier writers. I don't think I could so discipline myself on a regular basis. Perhaps I should try again. I have never written a sonnet - read hundreds in every style and topic - but can't get past a kind of personal mental block. Maybe an August challenge.

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