IN THE SHOWER
I am in the shower
hosing down the treasured carcase.
The water dances, gives itself
in a minor moment.
Pillars and steps, entrances to this older generation
are once more given respect, yet why?
for soon in full view of the
rolling conundrum of time and space
this carcase will die back
but while it holds a name
an intention
a history
the feeling is acceptable,
and the water is dancing then disappears
with a glistening goodbye
and with the drying off
an imperceptible sigh.
Stu Buck
Fri 11th Sep 2015 18:03
certainly does. first person present tense really conveys an immediacy and personal nature that i love, especially live. im not an academic, nor do i approach poetry in that way, so i find all this language analysis and metres a bit dull (has its place but im more interested in the stand up and shout side of poetry). you certainly are in a fine vein of form, something i am currently lacking!