Paul Waring

Levity, Brevity and Gravity

by Paul Waring

Sunday 5th February 2017 8:08 pm

the smooth oscillation of leaves

in the warm, gentle breeze

recalled the ethereal sensation

of your diaphanous touch,

the finesse of your fingers,

gliding over my skin like silk.

those achingly fleeting moments

of peak experience, the sweet

timelessness of tender intimacy

we cherished before the fading

light extinguished our hopes.

death has no respect for love.

how soon we witnessed the

cruel change that came to haunt

your beauty and steal your life

so rapidly that it denied us

the chance to say goodbye.

🌷(5)

◄ TAKE THE RAP

Ice and Fire of Desire ►

Comments

Paul Waring

Wed 15th Feb 2017 22:59

Hi Frances, I've just noticed your comment about this piece so please accept my apologies for the late reply.

I was so pleased to read your praise, I am very grateful to you.....and I will bear in mind your constructive suggestions.

Many thanks for being so thoughtful Frances.

Paul

Frances Macaulay Forde

Sat 11th Feb 2017 03:29

G'day Paul,
I loved this. You almost had me in tears.
Although I disagree with Lynn and Colin about the title; I didn't even read it until after the poem. I felt it like a hammer providing an explanation I didn't need which totally took me to places I didn't want to go.
If it was my poem (wish I was so clever) I would have called it 'Cruel Change' or something alluding to the essence not the 'construct'.
Best.
Frances. ?

Paul Waring

Mon 6th Feb 2017 10:05

Oh, C?L, how c??l.... you know what a huge Python fan I am....even after all these years I still laugh my stones off at the hilarity of them. This is a classic I'd forgotten about so thanks a million for sending it.

BTW, not a scrap of apology needed, your original comment was spot-on.

Paul ?

<Deleted User> (13762)

Mon 6th Feb 2017 09:43

Doh! Should've picked up on that Paul. Apologies. Still, always worth keeping the Grim Reaper at bay for as long as possible. Was it the salmon mousse?

https://youtu.be/GzejK4-qZ2E

Paul Waring

Mon 6th Feb 2017 09:24

Thanks Lynn, for reading and for your kind words.

Thanks Col, again, lovely words...re: the extra verse.. I wanted to capture levity of love in verse one and brevity of it in verse two. I wanted to open verse three (hard and heavy gravity of death/loss of love) with a pathos thunderbolt! But maybe it arrived too soon! Anyway, thanks again, it's always good to hear your thoughts.

Paul

<Deleted User> (13762)

Mon 6th Feb 2017 08:14

I agree with Lynn, both her points. But can't help but think an extra verse is needed. Death came too quick for me. Always a joy to read your work Paul, even the sad ones. Cheers, Col.

lynn hahn

Mon 6th Feb 2017 01:44

Really touching. The title was interesting too.

Paul Waring

Sun 5th Feb 2017 21:46

Thank you so much Juan Pablo, for reading and commenting, I am very grateful to you for these kind words.

Paul

Juan Pablo Lynch

Sun 5th Feb 2017 20:15

Death has no respect for love - words that should inspire many to appreciate life some more. Great poem. This poem really reminds me of a fine carved art piece the way it doesn't have little or no wasted word - really meaningful poem. Thanks for sharing

Juan

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