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I saw you over the communion wine
and right then
you had me.
Something in your smile
something in your eyes
something in the way
you turned away, then smiled again
you had me.
It started online
and I was on the right path
when you clicked "accept"
I was there
something moved
something stirred
something told me
that this was it.
It was.
Lovely. Full of symbolism. From the emotionally charged atmopshere of the communion queue ... to the thrill of online romance.
Pleasing contrasts.
A killer last line, and "you had me" works almost as well.
I wouldn't expect much response on this site, where militant secularists prevail. The churchy context wil put a lot of people off (may even invoke some irrational hostility).
But I like the poem. I like it a lot.It's about love, and being human.
You didn't speak that day at church? You waited for the impersonal keys of your laptop? Now, that is very interesting. And it is a good poem, certainly tuned into current courting.
The power of CHAT to allow people to drop their natural inhibitions is amazing. This happens even with longstanding relationships.
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winston plowes
Mon 28th Dec 2009 23:22
Hi Star G. I liked the mixture in this, would go further maybe with the religeous element. On line at the end would tie things in for me maybe, Win