<Deleted User> (8659)
Mon 21st Feb 2011 14:46
Hi David. Thanks for your comment on 'Mackerel In The Bath', which in turn has led me to your work. 'On My Daughter's Conversion To Islam', especially, is a wonderful piece of writing.
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I really like that change to the dreamtime, David. Seems to help it flow, and root it, too, if that makes sense! Probably not. But sometimes a small tweak can make a big difference, I've discovered.
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The only thing I'd say is that I wasn't sure about the line "focusing on this and that" which seemed to me a bit on the vague side. But I really liked the way you widened it out to encompass so much.
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No, I think Muscle Shoals and the motor city are fine as they are. I picked those lines out because I liked them so much. I ought to be more aware of modern singers, but with YouTube the temptation is to delve into the past ... or at least it is with me (see my current fb outpourings!)
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Hi David;
Cheers for the comments on the poem on 'Before the Curtains Open'.
This is one of those poems, I must admit that started off that started in one direction and ended up in totally another if that makes sense, but it is a snapshot really of a recent memory.
But glad you like it
Cheers – A
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Thanks for the help on East Budleigh, David. At your suggestion I've had a go at that line. As I said on the blog, the subject means a lot to me, and I've written at least three quite different versions of that poem (as well as a school essay at the age of 12!). It is at the heart of my childhood. I'll comment on yours a bit later, when I've had a chance to digest it. Btw, had a bit of good news yday, got a poem in the next edition of South. Greg
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<Deleted User> (8943)
Thu 30th Dec 2010 11:20
PS. Love the description of your grandfather's hands too... Prompts me to write about one of my earliest childhood memories, also a visit to a grandparent, thanks for the inspiration.
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<Deleted User> (8943)
Thu 30th Dec 2010 11:16
I think it must have been poem of the month then as I have read it before. Thanks for helping me remember :)
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<Deleted User> (8943)
Wed 29th Dec 2010 18:51
Really enjoyed your poems David, I recently read "Your Cahir" but I can't remember where, it will intrigue me until I unearth the memory...
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<Deleted User> (8672)
Wed 22nd Dec 2010 12:27
<Deleted User> (8672)
Wed 22nd Dec 2010 12:21
Hi David. Thank you so much for your kind words about 'At Cromer.' I appreciate it.
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hi dave; - god knows why i called john on my comment on your piece, but it's still a really good piece.
apologises again..
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To be honest, I prefer "white fellas", David. For me, it has the ring of the here and now, and I recognised it at once. I could hear it being said, in a sort of growl. But maybe white devils would be a more powerful contrast and make the same point more forcefully. As far as italics are concerned, we italicise foreign words and phrases that haven't become Anglicised. You could argue either way on white fellas! I enjoyed it very much. I bought a couple of CDs of Aboriginal music while I was out there. Very atmospheric. But my wife can't bear to listen to them! She doesn't mind the Australian birdsong CD so much.
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Hi David. Were you staying with friends or in hotels in Australia, or a bit of both? What amazed me was the richness of the Australian language. So many different words for everyday things that we'd never heard before. So many of them very comic! I started writing them down but gave up in the end and have now lost the notebook anyway. I suppose someone has published an English-Australian phrasebook by now ... maybe I'll have a look for it on Amazon ...
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Hiya Dave, the poems are up on The Beatles Story site think they're attached to the press release about the competition. As for the oem of the month thang, you deserve it, I bloody love that poem! :)
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Much obliged for your recent comments, David, and congratulations on getting a sheaf of poems into Agenda magazine. I haven't sent off much lately, but many thanks again for your consistent encouragement! How was Oz ... Melbourne and Brisbane?
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Cheers for your comments on Currawong, David. What a stroke of luck, to win a holiday to Australia. You've chosen a better time to go than we did, weather-wise, but my wife's is a primary school head, so we have no choice on dates: August or August.
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Hello David - yes, I've just posted to Greg that I enjoyed Treading Water too. I don't know if you know Selby but he's nailed the ambience and landscape spot-on.
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Fab stuff David....right back atcha :)
x
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_hPBUsNz1g
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Hi,no problem at all, I have a deep emotional response to your poems, tried to read one to my mum over the phone and had to choke back tears.... that's a compliment by the way :)
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Hi David. Cheers for the nomination - a happy new year for me! The welcome news coincided with an email from a colleague congratulating me on a headline I'd written, which doesn't happen very often, I can tell you! He'd also spotted something in it that I hadn't, which almost makes it on a par with poetry. Almost. Thanks for your suggestions about my samples; it's true, I suppose, I must spruce up my act. Good to see your pic, too. Mine's a pint of cider ...
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I used to work at Kew Bridge Steam Museum. Well worth a visit, esp if the engines are in steam (some weekends, I should think they will be in steam this weekend as it's bank holiday). It used to be a water pumping station, and the engines are massive things, many built in Cornwall. They have lots of other old machines that they've rescued from other pumping stations as they closed down. The huge standpipe tower is unmissable! You can see it for miles! (So that's your weekend sorted then!) xx
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Glad to hear your book is coming out early next year, David, but aren't you being a bit leisurely about 'launching' it in June?! Put me down for a copy, whenever it comes out. I might even pitch up at the Poetry Cafe in Reading one night, you never know!
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Thanks for your comments, on Something for Everyone and Carol Ann Duffy, David. Always good to hear from you. When is your new book of poems published? Any date yet?
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Sorry about my misinterpretation of The Pump: it was Hepstonstall in the title that got me going. To continue the water theme, while commenting on it I had a bath running, and got so carried away in warming to my subject it nearly overflowed. I went on an Arvon course, a prose one, back in 2004, and found it difficult to write while I was there. It was a lovely spot though, John Osborne's old gaff in Shropshire.
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Morning, David, good to hear from you. St Leonard's was written after a walk Gillian and I took with our daughter Kate. I just did it as an exercise really, listing the images I remembered, then trying to shape them into a sonnet in the early mornings while others were in bed. I find it's easier to do when you're in someone's else's flat or hotel room and don't have to worry about/find displacement activities such as filling the dishwasher or the washing machine. At least it's a recent effort: the previous two I put up here were three or fours years old! Look forward to reading more from you, old churches or otherwise. Btw, did I overhear a conversation here in which you said you sometimes read in Reading? I did a spot at Guildford last week
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<Deleted User> (6895)
Sun 28th Mar 2010 22:51
Cheers Dave-ohh! John Lee Hooker was the Man round the Manchester clubs-in the thar days-What a scene to have had the very good fortune of being in! fab gear Man! get my mojo out in a bit-sniff sniff! Stef.
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Hi David. You should give South a go sometime. I found downloading the fiddly form and filling it in less bother than writing a covering letter. The only trouble is, sometimes they put in a reserve list, and you have to wait a little while longer before finding out whether you've made the cut. At the same time the sample poetry in The North, from five years ago in the Poetry Library, seems just my kind of thing, I must admit. Greg
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Hi David, good to see you back here. I thought you'd done a runner! You're right, it has been quiet on the comments lately. So much so that I put two poems up last week then took them down again a couple of days later after they both received nul points, diva that I am! Funnily enough, The Reluctant Volunteer is one of my very few poems that has been published, in South last year.
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Alice Oswald, Don Paterson, Simon Armitage, Carol Ann Duffy and many, many others ... I didn't realise you were in such exalted company until I Googled the list of Gregory award winners over the years, David! Thanks for your comments on The Tide and the Light. I was inspired to put it up by reading your The Tide, and noticing the similarities in title and subject matter. Greg
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Hi Ann Will do, although it's a bit of a slow process at the moment. Still, until recently I hadn't done anything for twenty years and just had all the old stuff lying in a drawer. I need to stop working!
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Hi again! I hope you'll let me know when your book comes out. I'd like to buy a copy (well, that's one sold anyway!)
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Ah yes, the dream time indeed! It does seem so long ago now, yet on the other hand, more vivid than ever. Thanks for looking at Andy Williams and Sandy Denny. The latter feels fragmentary and unfinished to me, that I haven't done her justice. So I will have another go at it some day. Btw, I see there are two different John Martyn biographies on Amazon, and one of them is to be reissued, updated presumably, later this year.
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Hi Helen Fancy meeting you here! If you posted your German contract it would be good for anyone suffering from insomnia. On second thoughts maybe not. I think you've seen everything I've posted so far, except Valedictory.
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<Deleted User> (7479)
Wed 10th Feb 2010 01:27
Hi Dad! Managed to find you on here and will have a browse through the new stuff soon - now off to bed. I'm exhausted as I also produced a total masterpiece today (well... a lengthy German contract for secured transportation of valuables but it was v. well written if I say so myself ;)) x
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Trivia corner time, David. I guess you knew that John Martyn spent the first five years of his life in the south-west London suburb of New Malden. But did you also know that Peter Green grew up there, and that it is now full of Koreans? Oh, and Sandy Denny was born in the same hospital in Merton as me, only one year apart. But I digress ...
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Hi Ann Now you're talking. Of course I know that one. As you can tell from the poem I was addicted to Solid Air. I remember that I had this tape I made with Solid Air on one side and Bless the Weather on the other. It really was a tired loop of tape because I didn't have a lot of music in France and I must've played that tape thousands of times. There was a point where I'd had enough of being over there and I played and played The Man in The Station, doing my John Martyn drawl to the bit where he sings 'I'm catching the next train hoooooome'. I also love the later track Serendipity and was quite please with myself for getting it into the poem. If you catch up with the YouTube footage it's devastating. The recent biography is a great read and sort of inspired me to write the poem in the first place.
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Sorry! I am anidiot - it is called Small Hours (but I'm sure you can hear geese in there somewhere!) I'm listening to it now and there's just this bit where he changes key and it just makes you want to die - so lovely!
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David, you must post up your elegy for John Martyn! I've probably seen him play more than any other artist over the years, including on what I think was his last tour. He was one of the few musical acts that myself and the wife equally like. I'm sure there are others here who would appreciate it. Greg
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<Deleted User> (6895)
Sun 7th Feb 2010 22:49
Dave,do I like blues??????do horses like carrots?????? gimme gimme-name it!!! make it sixties!!!Stefferz
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Well I got as far as "1 am grateful with you he said to her" with a gaelic translator , then gave up as a bad job cos it was taking too long... Got the gyst though! Cheers!
Cate xx
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Lol,this is my version of reading the sunday papers, on my second cup of tea , valiantly ignoring the mess surrounding me(it's a talent)
Rachel
x
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Deborah Jordan Bailey
Sat 6th Feb 2010 12:25
Hi David, it's probably the same site I have saved from where I send an Occitan-speaking friend poetry..shhh don't tell him where it is.. Someone said somewhere that using the internet for research is like trying to take a sip of water from a fire hydrant..hmmm don't drown out there..We used to sing Scots Gaelic songs at school but much to my frustration,not much stuck. I am very interested in the Romani language too and always interested to find words cropping up in dialect which can be traced back to Romani.I am no expert in it at all, just interested. I wonder if anglo-romanes cant is a dying or a growing language? the word chav for instance,comes from the Romani word for child; chavi,but has come to be an insulting term. Shame when words and their original meanings become polluted but I guess that has a long history.
Better stop now, thanks for re-awakening my interest in this subject..via Rachel's lovely poem as well, Debzx
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David, thanks for looking at my poems. Very heartened that you enjoyed Dance On. Only wish I could turn out more like that one! I particularly admire your Charlie Parker and Miles Davis. As I've said before, I've very interested in trying to capture the essence of inspirational, mood-changing music in words. Charlie and Miles are great examples to try and match. Greg
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Hiya David, I loved reading your samples and adored 'Visiting' in particular. I quite honestly can't get the
'were ponderous chunks
of granite, notched
carelessly for fingers'
line out of my head. Beautiful.
Can I have your head when you've finished with it please?
Rachel
x
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<Deleted User> (7075)
Tue 2nd Feb 2010 18:01
Hi David... well,look what happens. you go away for a weekend and everything goes on without you. lol. Offical welcome to WOL from me and yes, you seem to be finding your way around the site. there are lots of aspects to it and it takes time. have fun exploring and leaving comments etc. Thanks for being an active member already. Win
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To be honest, I was disappointed with Candelabrum, a scruffy little mag without even a contents list. I only mentioned it to flesh out my thin CV. Unlike yours!
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Hi Greg Glad you like Dylan and Coltrane. I've tuned in and out of Dylan over the decades. I tend to have fanatical phases and get him out of my system until I play catch-up again a few years later, although judging by his last couple of offerings I think we've had the best of him. Stereogram was the first poem I wrote after my 'sabbatical' which lasted for more than 20 years. It's about Dylan but it's also sort of about me. I've always loved the blues since I was a kid got into jazz in my very early 20s. I've written the odd jazz inspired poem every now and then. I've had a collection of poems sat in a drawer all the years I stopped writing. Slow Blues is probably now the final title, but it refers to the mood of the poems. There are lots of poems in memory of my father + the poems examined my lapsed Catholicism. The Coltrane poem will be in it, though. I'll post a couple more from my first collection. One on Charlie Parker and a little one on Miles. BY the way well done for getting into Candelabrum. I sent him some stuff over a year ago and the so and so never even got back to me!
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Philipos
Sun 13th Mar 2011 15:24
Dave another great poem - I think I know exactly what you mean when enraptured by environment - this happens to me a lot particularly when in the fens - great stuff
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