The Last Hurrah

When I’m old and knackered and all my body parts

have fallen into disrepair, need regular jump starts

If my eyes can’t see and I can’t hear what you say

don’t force feed me with remedies, just help me on my way

My poor old mum’s been poorly, in fact she had a fall

we called the ambulance and she’s gone to hospital

The ward is so depressing, nurse does...

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What’s Your Name?

If I don’t come to say hello, please don’t take offence

It’s not because I’m being rude, it’s just because I’m dense

I’ve met you several times before but can’t recall your name

I know that we were introduced, damn my stupid brain

I’m feeling under pressure now, if you come over first

If you remember my name, that makes it even worse

I’m going throu...

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MY OLD MAN'S A SPURS FAN

My old man’s a Spurs fan, he’s Tottenham to the core

He’s had a season ticket since the grand old age of four

If you want to get him going and you’ve got an hour to spare

Just mention Tottenham Hotspur and find yourself a comfy chair

If he was Tottenham’s manager he’d get them out of trouble

If they signed him up and listened next year they’d win the...

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