I can remember the day
That I saw a picture of you
And didn't react at all

No rage
No sneers
No tears
Nothing.

I've never been happier to feel nothing

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The word and I cannot coexist
I try to say it
I try to say it when it's late and i'm alone
When the only person who can hear me
Is me
But
It sticks in my throat
Turns my mouth to ash
Chokes me until tears stream
And the word is lost in my brain

So
I try to think it
I try to think it when the words fail
When I think that maybe if I can recignize it
Then it can't hurt me
Therapy...
...

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