I said shecheheyanu

before I kissed them both

traces of paint still wreathed our bodies

I followed the faint lines

and listened to the whistling of the wind

as it swept through

the cracks in the old barn’s attic

we threw a blanket

over the slatted

wood floor, covering the dust --

the remains of a 

Golem

destroyed centuries past --

If you’re quiet

on a wind...

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outstretched    hand your hand

 grasping    reminding

 reciting    the parts of

you like a litany to me

[everything that I can still remember]

singing your life like a

prayer

 staccato

 pestilence petulence

precision

lost among the

             waves of time

this time.

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toxic train track

metal waste raindrop

incarcerated too long too late

no reply.

faintly.

Risk until one always.

Any ways. Anyways.

fastforward. Visual rewind

incongruity. Incongruous.

Inferior absolutes. Taste

lingering remnant after

gauzy impossibility.

Ending. Search mystified.

Final helping of emptiness

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false start.

Draw too deep breath.

Linger too long.

take back   break

   neck  speed  one

 two  don’t   stop ask

 once    no twice

Forget.  

    Slowly.

Forego solid food.

Count to ten.

  hold on   elastic pill

     tight  stretch

     release      sharp no time

fixing not broken not ever

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our mothers

          are windows

through them

          we see the world

and in them

          we see the faintest

reflection

of our selves

they are not easy to

                               break

but neither are they

unbreakable

to break them

          we run the risk

of injury

our knuckles crack

as does their glass

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He dissected them

I donned rubber gloves

and pulled apart their organs

trying to understand

how it was

that I was any better than them

or even

any different.

—–

He loved the distance a pen could create

offering the safety of clinical observation

placing him behind the Plexiglas

and far above

so that he appeared clean and professional

all the while taking g...

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I don’t have a poem for you

you don’t feel volatile

I am sputtering like a flame someone left too close to

            an open window

but you are not the chilly night air

you are not the frayed wick

I still haven’t figured out what you are

you are like deja vu with pretty eyes

seeing a splintering of a thousand potential futures

they all exist because none of them exist ...

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This one is not for you.

Stay.

Stay.

Close your eyes

    those framed portraits

[eager and aloof.]

one day red

full stop

left to [no] exchange

grasping

looking

[looking]                                                             up   up            down

stay.

Stay sane.

in

with no regard,

                           heaviness,

luke warm

        ...

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