I feel stuck,

Stuck between a dark place and rock bottom.

I am so scared,

Scared that if you saw the real me you wouldn’t like me,

Actually you would be disgusted.

Longing for something hidden so deep inside,

I no longer recognize it.

Shunned upon by society, never to see the light of day.

And if the day shall come that you might have to see it,

Will you love me still,

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It is not because you were too weak,

It is because your heart was too big and that is why it hurt so deep.

It is not because you weren't beautiful,

It is because they refused to see that beauty.

It is not because you weren't worthy,

It is because they weren't worthy of you.

It is not because you didn't deserve the love,

It is because the love came with an embedded hatred.

I...

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I am waiting.

Waiting for something that seems will never come.

Fighting a losing battle every day,

I am at a loss,

But I can never accept defeat.

So instead I wait.

It is the only way I can continue living,

For if I give up the wait now,

I fear that the pain of loss will be too much to handle.

So instead I put pen to paper, pour out my soul,

And wear my heart on my s...

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If you don’t see me,

You will see my might.

If you don’t see me,

You will see my strength.

If you don’t see me,

You will see my resilience, my perseverance,

My determination and my sacrifice.

If you don’t see me,

You will see my rise.

If you don’t see me,

You will see my success, my triumph and,

You will see my victory as clear as day.

Most of all if you don’t s...

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Do I deserve it,

Tell me do I deserve it,

I said do I deserve it.

Happiness, love, compassion,

Do I deserve it.

Companionship, faith, trust,

Do I deserve it.

Loyalty, respect, honesty and understanding,

Do I deserve it.

Better yet don’t I deserve it.

Why don’t I deserve it,

Why not me,

I suppose I could be better and do better.

I suppose I do have my own flaw...

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Hurt,

Hurt by the circumstances,

Hurt by the situation.

My heart is filled with pain.

Even though I know it’s not my fault,

I still blame myself and cry myself to sleep every night.

I walk in the shadow of who I used to be.

Longing to be understood.

I am a shell of my former self.

My faith slowly fading away in the darkness.

“Mercy, mercy” I cry,

For it is the only...

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Is it ok to aim for something higher.

To crave and desperately desire something higher.

Is it ok to wonder about the meaning of it all, the purpose of it all.

Is it ok to walk and see and hope that in the end it is the right thing and all worthwhile.

Is it ok to feel unaccomplished, uncomplete until you get it.

Is it ok to think about it all the time and wonder if it will ever come,...

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I see the beauty of the world.

The wonder of life.

The freedom in youth and the joy of a dream and purpose fulfilled.

I see beauty in the rewards of hard work and dedication.

The delicacy of it all.

I see people not realizing how fragile it all is and how it could disappear in the blink of an eye.

Idling away and carelessly going through their days.

I also see pain, suffering,...

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