J.D. Bardo

A Guiding Star

by J.D. Bardo

Saturday 16th January 2021 11:08 am

You must be ready to.

Accept yourself for the, who.

That you show the others, that you are.

You must present yourself proudly.

Whatever your message, speak it loudly.

Make a bold, and colorful statement.

And let your uniqueness shine like the brightest star.

If you can be happy with the "you" that God has made.

If you can express yourself openly, and honestly, and, not be afraid.

If you have confidence and acceptance in yourself.

You will be better off by far.

Others will see.

Your original personality.

And you will truely be.

A Guiding Star.

By JD. Bardo

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Comments

J.D. Bardo

Sun 17th Jan 2021 15:29

Thanks to everyone, one and all. and especially you Aviva, sincerely thank-you for participating, I am happy to see you on WOL regularly, and look forward to seeing your contributions. I like them all. (don`t change a one, once written, it is done). JD.

victoriavautaw@gmail.com

Sun 17th Jan 2021 00:54

Love this poem J.D. Thank you for sharing your God-given gift. ❤

Aviva Rifka Bhandari

Sat 16th Jan 2021 17:08

Absolutely I agree you should leave it as you intend it and my reference to a wide audience of people who would like it better that way implied this. I stated that I agree with Keith on purpose to show that I agree with everything he said (including that it is a good poem and a lesson, and we are all offering something unique, etc) - basically I did as much as possible to show that I do know you should keep this poem as you intend whilst still representing what I do and don't like about it. I could have not commented at all but I wanted to show support for everything else that it says so well whilst not misrepresenting myself either.

keith jeffries

Sat 16th Jan 2021 17:01

JD.,

Your reply to Aviva's constructive criticism really hits the mark. I believe firmly in God, yet I accept there are those who don't. So be it. You are the author of this poem and despite the value of constructive criticism your integrity is at stake. I would leave this poem exactly as you have written it, not to do so would impair its authenticity.
Keith

J.D. Bardo

Sat 16th Jan 2021 16:49

Aviva, I respect your opinion on my poem, I did read it with that line removed, it did not rhyme correctly. Also with the line removed it is not the poem that I created, nor would it reflect my belief in there being a God, and my freedom to express that belief in my poetry. I could change it, but then it becomes your poem. JD.

Aviva Rifka Bhandari

Sat 16th Jan 2021 16:18

I agree with Keith but I could almost wish that the line 'If you can be happy with the "you" that God has made.' were not there because I agree entirely with the rest of the poem but I am just not someone who thinks God has anything to do with the final outcome of things - might not even exist at all.

But there is a huge audience of people who adore references to God's overseeing powers and don't find any contradiction in bemoaning people's behaviours whilst simultaneously claiming god was the joyous cause of everything that happens.

Incidentally the poem works really well without that line since an almost identical sentiment (except for the god reference) is in the line 'If you have confidence and acceptance in yourself.'

keith jeffries

Sat 16th Jan 2021 11:44

A strong element of truth lies in this poem as self confidence and self esteem are essential as we deal with the world. It is often easy to be overwhelmed by others and made to feel inadequate. We are all unique and have something to offer. Beware of those who demean you as it is often a sign of their inadequacy. A good poem and a lesson also.

Thank you for this
Keith

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