(With an enormous nod in the direction of the excellent Steve Womack)

We made our way to bed one night

I pulled down all the blinds

We kissed by filtered moonlight

Passion in our minds.

My wife broke from our close embrace

“I won’t be long.  Don’t go”

And headed for the bathroom door

Then cruelly stubbed her toe.

She cried in pain and anguish

Which turned to plaintive sob

Her toe turned black in anger

Continuing to throb.

Vicariously her pain was mine

To see how this upset her

I gently took her foot to me,

“Let Daddy kiss it better.”

One thing led to another so

I need not state the rest

Suffice to say our lovemaking

Was of the very best.

And after we’d recovered

She rose to leave once more

But stubbed her toe a second time

Upon the bathroom door.

My darling wife began to sob

“That’s twice I’ve done it now”

I farted and rolled over, mumbling,

“Well you clumsy cow”