It Just Ain’t Gonna Happen!

 

Like Bono becoming the next Pope

Like Glastonbury without any dope

Like the Dingles washing with soap

Oh well some things you live in hope

But I doubt they'll ever happen!

 

Like inflation rates going down

Like a cheap night on the town

Like Elvis Presley being found

Or Jedward making a decent sound

It just ain’t gonna happen!

 

Like some love being unrequited

Like a City fan supporting United

Like John Major looking delighted

Or the Archbishop of Canterbury getting excited

It just ain’t gonna happen!

 

Like the East accepting the West

Like the Middle East without unrest

Like the Devil being blessed

or Stockport County becoming the best

It just ain’t gonna happen!

 

Like a Laurel & Hardy film without Stan

Like a Muslim not reading the Koran

Like most women not liking Duran Duran

Or the Phantom Flan Flinger without a flan

It just ain’t gonna happen!

 

Like the mocked accepting the mockers

Like the Mods accepting the Rockers

Like the Byrne family accepting the Fockers

It just ain’t gonna happen!

 

But like a cut that doesn’t bleed

or like a dictator without greed

or a world without Children in Need

These are some things I’d like to see

But I doubt they’ll ever happen.

 

Jeff Dawson October 2011