(Weasel Words)

 

I can’t pretend I like the trend

Towards new weasel words

As often used and then abused

By broadcasters and nerds.

 

My mate Justin you can trust in

To catch the latest trends

He’s “way too this” and “Yay!” to that

With all his Facebook Friends.

 

Me? I’m cuss words, Justin’s buzzwords

In this he’s not alone

But hijacking of meaning

I just cannot condone.

 

Now Justin speaks of “Networking”

(The contacts that he’s keeping)

Why not just be honest, Just,

And say that you’ve been creeping?

 

Another word he’s taken to

That I’d drop for a starter

To mean he’s living over t’brush

He says he’s got a “Partner”.

I told him it’s pretentious

That he should drop it pronto

‘Cos proper partners are blokes like

The Lone Ranger and Tonto.

 

Another word’s “Accessible”

To mean “well understood”

I think the world’s gone PC mad

I’d ban the word for good.

The only time I’d break this rule

Or when I’m hesitant is

If describing wheelchair ramps

Or maybe crotchless panties.

 

Now his name and little willy

He takes some stick about

But reckons that to be “Justin”

Is better than “Just Out”.