I am
The twitch of your curtain
Your future uncertain
Your mosquito bite
Your sweats in the night
Your nightmares repeated.
Your hopes all deleted.
Your sighs half forgotten
Your morning sheets sodden.
The stone in your shoe
The steak you cant chew.
The lines on your face
The years that you race.
The shadows that haunt you
The memories that taunt you.
The tears in your eyes
The smile in your lies.
Really good! Especially enjoyed the fear felt within the poem!
I have read this one several times, and today it finally hit me!
Superb : )
Hi Cate... This is quite a common format of poem. (The list of personal traits). May I say that your poem is a great example. Has a great grittiness and edge. Loved it, the middle section-
Your nightmares repeated.
Your hopes all deleted.
Your sighs half forgotten
Your morning sheets sodden.
I thought particularly original. Winston
Thanks for your comment Christine .
I think you may be right about it being a performance poem Steve, I`ll try it out at the Tudor sometime when the mood is right!!
Really like this, well done Cate.
Cx
Cate, I can envisage this working especially well in performance. It has a mechanical rhyme and rythmn to it, and yet the subject material is personal and emotional. Powerful.
Thanks Nabila for your comment on my first post. Much appreciated.
You too Isobel.
A great poem Cate - maybe we are all this for someone.
<Deleted User>
Sun 7th Jun 2009 12:31
this is wonderful :-)
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Yvonne Brunton
Fri 4th May 2012 20:55
oho that last line is the killer! A powerful poem worthy os a stage delivery. I can hear the last line as a wistful yet sinister sotto voce. XX