1.Yorkshire

 

When I was young, we used to live in Yorkshire

Except, for some reason, our bit was called the West Riding

I assume there were also North, South and East one’s too

No fun at all, but required, I assume, so as to maintain geographical equality

 

Some people just seem to have no imagination

If I was in charge of giving things names

I’d have called them things like Piggy-back Riding, Bike Riding

Or White-knuckle Riding and perhaps Horse Riding

 

Then I could have told Mam I was off to see my mate in ‘Piggy-back’

Or meet my girlfriend in ‘Horse’

Then we’d have both known exactly where I was headed

Honestly, some people just have no imagination

 

2.What if?

What if the whole world decided

Sod it.  Let’s get it over with.

And had one massive war

Which succeeded in wiping out

Everyone in the world.

 

What would be the point of that?

We’d never find out who won

Prove who was right and wrong

If anyone was actually right at all

I suppose some of us, maybe all of us, will find out.