now and again
I feel the premature
sting of loss...
as I look upon
the mound of your womb
I want to place a kiss
so that, if the slow
drip of time passes
it's poison properly
and you descend before me
into the cool dark ground
I'll never forget the taste
of my tears upon your belly
as long as I live.
#t=7.5
now and again
I feel the premature
sting of loss...
always we feel the sting of loss
even before we have it
we miss it
Travis Brow
Wed 10th May 2017 07:10
This is lovely elP. Bittersweet. I keep going back to the line; if the slow/drip of time passes/it's poison properly' At first it threw me but if i'm reading it right, it suggests that time is poisonous in the sense that it's ultimately deadly?
Also, you seem to have the motif of death in life, or death and life side by side in the line; the mound of your womb', where mound recalls a grave, and obviously womb refers to life.
A thoughtful and though provoking piece. Nice one.
Conor Oberst - what a talent. Digital Ash in a Digital Urn is one of my favourite albums.
Señora elPintor, this is such a beautiful poem. It has an almost tragic sadness. I keep on reading it over and over again as it evokes so much thought. Thank you indeed. Keith
Frances Macaulay Forde
Mon 8th May 2017 04:52
Poem of the week - huge congratulations! ?
elPintor
Thu 4th May 2017 00:20
Thanks so much for all of your kind comments and I appreciate everyone who hit the "like" button.
I happened to watch a movie yesterday evening, dwelling on the theme of death as an act of creation. As a concept, I would like to explore it more--though, even without being schooled on it, I know that the idea is very similar to what I intended here.
elP xx
Fantastic and wonderful elP. A lovely crafted piece.
Ray
elP, I liked this the other day but, as with all good poems, it has stayed with me and drawn me back repeatedly. Beautiful and memorable, quite a feat!
Paul
Frances Macaulay Forde
Wed 3rd May 2017 02:26
So sad but romantic...
Beautiful.
wonderful elP. so much longing, an acceptance of mortality and the defiance of love. beautiful.
<Deleted User> (13740)
Tue 2nd May 2017 10:14
Beautiful but sad xx
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elPintor
Sat 24th Jun 2017 00:11
Wherever you are, Travis, I couldn't have interpreted this to the masses any better than you did in your comment. You read my mind. And, you did it beautifully, brother.
Rachel