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coromandel

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Don’t build me a coffin

of coromandel wood,

just leave me be.

No ormolu brass handles,

not for me.

No church, no pews, no prayers

and not that final curtain call.

Please.

 

Dress me in white lace

as for my wedding day.

Carry me to the meadow

and just let me lay.

Circle me with daisy chains

if you must

for there is nothing more to say

and all is dust.

 

You may forget my name

my voice my face

but maybe if you ever come

to this quiet place

to see the meadow where the daisies grow

blow a sweet kiss to me

and then I’ll know

that somewhere in your heart

there’s still a place

where you keep my name,

my voice, my face.

 

 

photo : Keith1999

 

 

 

 

 

 

◄ Wolf Rock

unrequited ►

Comments

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Anthony Emmerson

Thu 27th May 2010 22:45

Hi Ann,

Apologies for not commenting on this earlier. You posted it when I was off-site for a while so I missed it; and only now (via a very circuitous route) have discovered it. You don't need to change anything in this, and I would second Banksy's comments - it's a beautiful poem, delicately and thoughtfully handled. If there were a riposte to Auden's "Funeral Blues" this would be it. The title draws the reader in (isn't Coromandel a fantastic word - in the same way that Timbuktu and Samarkand and Xanadu are?) There is only one thing wrong with this - I wish I'd written it!

Regards,
A.E.

<Deleted User> (7212)

Mon 8th Feb 2010 21:28

Hi Ann - coromandel - many thanks for letting me include this really great poem. if you want to you can see it here
http://www.poemsetfree.com/index.php?page=favourite-poems-by-other-authors

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Ann Foxglove

Mon 8th Feb 2010 08:08

Cynthia, thanks for commenting. Re the forgetting and blowing a kiss thing, I wanted to get the feeling across that I would oneday almost live on in such a place (if only!) and so that anyone coming across the meadow would just get a feeling that they wanted to send a wish or a thought to the spirit of the place (me)and blowing a kiss seems such a silent gentle special way of communicating. Whether the person had ever known me and forgotten me or not. And you can forget someone for an hour or two and then something, a place or a song or whatever, brings them back to you. Like perfume. Or something! xx

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Ann Foxglove

Mon 8th Feb 2010 07:54

Re the repetition. I recently found in an old notebook a poem by Sir Walter Raleigh that I'd copied out when I was about 18. It was a clever little thing where you can read it up and down and across. And I love the repetition in that poem. Of course I can't get it to do that here!Her face*Her tongue*Her wit * So fair*So sweet*So sharp * First bent*Then drew*Then hit * Mine eye*Mine ear* My heart. * Her face*So fair*FIrst bent*Mine eye* Her tongue*So sweet*Then drew*Mine ear.*Her wit*So sharp*Then hit*My heart.

<Deleted User> (7212)

Sun 7th Feb 2010 23:16

ann - this isn't just good or very good, IMHO it's worldclass - seriously. can I include it on my website with appropriate acknowledgement? B

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Sue Hall

Sun 7th Feb 2010 23:10

I really liked this Ann, I thought it was very moving.

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 7th Feb 2010 19:49

Ann, this is very good.
I am not going to presume it's personal, even with the postscript and the photo. I do find a little inconsistency in 'forgetting the name'. I don't see how 'blowing a kiss' would even occur in that circumstance.

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Jon

Sun 7th Feb 2010 17:07

Beautiful.

<Deleted User> (7164)

Sun 7th Feb 2010 16:58

In a word? Lovely.

I know some don't think of the subject matter as lovely but the imagery here certainly is. :-)

Janet.x

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Graham Sherwood

Sun 7th Feb 2010 11:50

Ann I love this piece and especially as Rachel says the middle verse. I do have one small piece of criticism though. I think the last two lines are superfluous, and the repetition of name, voice and face is too close. Lovely work.

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Rachel McGladdery

Sun 7th Feb 2010 10:59

I was actually just lurking this morning but logged in to comment on this, the line 'for there is nothing more to say/and all is dust' is totally perfect.... wish I had the critical tools and brain to know why, but it just is.
What a lovely poem. I think that stanza actually stands on it's own as a poem.
Loved this.
Rach
xxx

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Cate Greenlees

Sat 6th Feb 2010 19:38

I like this Anne. I wrote a poem called Sunflowers some time back which has the same resonance as this.
Ive left all my instructions to my family for when the great day comes... I want a good send off with lots of flowers and music and loads a weeping and wailing!!!!
Cate xx

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