What with all the omnishambles of Brexit, I got to thinking about what our national identity really is.  When you think about it, we have some pretty bizarre national symbols, but ultimately what does it mean to be British / English, etc?  See what you think of this...

Rule Britannia?

Our national dish is curry, true,

Our Saint is George who dragons slew,

From Yorkshire field...

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Breaking the Laws…

They repealed the law of gravity

They said it with such clarity

To tackle the disparity

Between total hilarity

And absolute insanity

A whole mess in entirety, 

It was all up in the air.

The law of relativity

Supported our community.

Unique individuality

Was now our top priority

Selfies and technology

Replaced our core humanity,

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In the recent storms and typhoons, I heard advice from US police to people not evacuating to write theirnames on their arms as it might be the only way to identify them.  This somewhat brutal advice inspiredthe following rather apocalyptic poem - if you look closely I hope you can find a message of hope! 

Run for the Hills

Write your name upon your arm,

On your sleeve tattoo you...

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Superhero Love?

She had a thing for Spiderman, she loved his legs so hairy,

Some would shriek and run the tap, she never found him scary,

The way he walked, his great big eyes, he drove her up the wall.

But he never did the dusting, in fact no work at all,

Spent all his time just on the web,

Hanging round all day.

She had to tell him all the time

Don’t touch ...

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Get up and Gone

I remember when my uncle, with watery eyes,

Told me how his get up and go

Had got up and gone.

We were looking at the framed photo of his wife,

40 years together, and now only one.

His shoulders shook, a man once so strong,

Used to laughter, drinks and quick with a quip or joke.

And I remember when I too lost sight of the sun,

My vision blurred,...

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Granny Hi Tech

 My mum’s been posting selfies… at the age of ninety two!

She’s becoming all tech savvy, whilst I haven’t got a clue.

They say a dog can get too old to teach itself new tricks,

But she’s on Twitter, Instagram, even downloads from Netflix.

It all started back at 80, when the tablets which she took

Turned into a new device, a brand new i-mac book.

She logged on to...

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When Clio Met Rio… For Better or Verso

“You dipstick!” she said, slipping into her mini,

You went through the gears, but don’t get ideas.

Chrysler! Don’t try to air con me,

Corsa you love me, I misread your signals,

My stick shift all tingles

Never did run smooth, true love’s Corsa,

Don’t leave me to break down,

All on the hard shoulder.

She began to tire, feeling d...

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My step dad, Robin, passed away a short time ago at the ripe old age of 94.  An incredible man, he lived an incredible life, including working at Bletchley Park codebreaking during the war, putting out fires at ST Paul's Cathedral, living in Australia, India, Ireland and Scotland and writing numerous books in his role as a well respected minister and scholar.  He met my mum again after 50 years, p...

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The Slam

They told me we would do a slam

Of odes and poems and wham bam mam

Our words and rhymes would fight it out

We mustn’t mutter, better shout!

A ittle like a boxing bout;

So off I went to start to train

Like Rocky, in the ring again.

My female rival? Well, I’d beat her,

With exercise of regular metre.

My metaphors would pack a punch

I’d knock em dea...

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Tell Me

Tell me, Stranger, tell me do,

What makes the world spin round for you?

What do you love, what makes you cry?

What do you hope, before you die?

Tell me, Father, plant a seed,

What path I follow, where you lead,

Give me compass, strength and plan,

To show me how to be a man.

Hold me Mother, sing me songs,

Give me rites for all my wrongs,

You g...

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When Tibbles had Nibbles

There once was a mouse

We had in our house

Came over the fence

And I use the past tense

Advisedly

For I have a cat

Who’s getting quite fat

Less crotchet, more minim.

But still has it in him…

Literally.

He pussy foots around

Look what I found!

Fluff on his claws

Spaghetti in his jaws,

Dangling.

His fluffed ...

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Been working on this for a while... not sure about it really, but see what you think..

Stu of the Steps

This is my pitch, here’s where I sit

Cardboard and cushion to keep cold at bay

Down steps from the station, just half way

Gives em time to see me, reflect a bit.

Not all the way down, hanging in there

Holding my own, keeping my space

Forgotten detritus of t...

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Only One Winner

He dropped a glass

On my stone floor

And there was only one winner.

She breathed her last

Was at death’s door

And there was only one winner.

He took a chance

She faced a threat

And there was only one winner.

He lived a life,

He paid his debt

And there was only one winner.

My nights were dark

The sun arose

And the...

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The Body of Life

RIP Paul

Don’t hold on to the cord too long

As the casket drops back to the ground

Listen and hear the blackbird’s song

As loved ones whisper all around.

Holding on can pull you down,

Time to let go with laughs and tears.

One life so brief now clearly shown

Should soothe all worries, quell your fears.

Suits new pressed in Sunday be...

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The Shooter

Must be quite a kick, that feeling

Walking the corridors with power,

Knowing you have that which others don’t

Holding it close, nestling, kneeling

Taking aim as others cower

Doing that which others won’t

Taking life, paying back, being

For once the number one,

The big man, standing proud and tall

The one who sends the toughest fleeing.

Alone, just ...

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Only Connect

We don’t want to be alone…

But our deepest relationship is with our phone

Like a dog with a bone, checking the tone.

We swipe and we flick,, we tick and we post,

Poking, retweeting, who likes us the most?

We turn on the roast, we like and give stars,

But end of the day, do we know who we are?

This ain’t how it could be,

It’s wrong, do you see?

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Figures of Speech

One sin a lifetime

Two young too much

Three tened me father

Four who he did touch

Five said it once...

Six son I am

‘S even stevens

Eight errible man

"Nine!" said the fuhrer

Ten ding to fear

Eleven kill Santa

Tw’elves and a deer!

X

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A poem about getting old... and staying young.

May I Never      

I may never rule the world with theories so fine

May never run past Bolt, smile and duck across the line.

I may never meet Mandela, Obama or the Queen,

I may never solve all wars, or stop leaders being mean.

I may never reach a hundred, run for thirty miles,

I may never help the hungry, turn their cries to happy...

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A little poem for all the teachers out there...

Season of Tests

Season of tests and sallow fruitlessness,

Pacing the aisles of shuffling fidget minds

Tapping pens and flicking rulers and the mess

Of scrunched up paper, shavings and the rinds,

Satsumas curling, yellowing skins up turned,

Ink stained fingers, mucky finger nails,

The slow stumble of old ideas new learned.

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