I want a love that is mine

Songs and poems couldn't experience

Only dreams and distant thoughts have encountered

I want a love that is yours

Receive it, replicate it, return it

I want a love that is ours

Can you love me again

And give the love I want 

To the real me this time

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I can confide in you carefree

You don't judge nor scold

Yet you hold no secrets

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I never thought that I'd ever be the one to hurt

We never know what we're capable of

Until the damage is done

I wear the scares of my offender

And gave scares to my victim

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My heart has a gauge

She feels only so much hurt and shuts down

Nothing can resuscitate her

Once she's gone below

Like a fortress guarding prisoners

Life without parole

I've tried to help break her free

She shuts down

Goes into solitary

and serves her sentence

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Thoughs race through me constantly

There's no break or pause

Will someone shut it off

Nothing stops you

You take in the alcohol

That's your fuel

Though after thought

No rest at all

No nothing box

No matter how small

Can you rest for just a moment

Maybe you'd finally see

Madness is your name

You engulf me

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I'll save me

Because I won't be what I used to be

I don't like the darkeness

She tries to take me there

Through every emotion

I won't despair

For I embrace her, so I can definitely stand

I can't go back to the darkness

I finally can see

That the woman I'm becoming

Really is me

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Good morning

I'm not sure who I am today

Someone that thinks she is okay

And maybe I am

or not

She varies from time to time

I'm not sure who you'll get

Just have to wait and see

It's ok

It's all me

Just don't know who it'll be

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You were my hope

I was looking for me in you

Yet I hurt and scarred the only thing I truly believed

I wasn't good enough

I used to be

I saw me

The me I didn't want you to see

The scared me

The damaged me

The lost me

You were my light

But I had my eyes closed all the way

Now your gone

And I'm in darkness

again

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He was everything I used to be

Hopeful, true and kind

My past engulfed me

Made me a scavenger

In touch with the me I've buried

I like her, she makes me feel alive

Yet brings death to me all at once

Yet she is me

He tried to save me from her

But she had a hold on me

I did what she wanted

All the time

And it felt good

Being bad

But

He made me good

But ...

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She comes out whenever she pleases

We both inhabit this place

She means no good

No remorse for what she does

Fun, games and self satisfaction

She claims her prey

She hunts few and far in between

But when she does

Gluteny is her goal

She's always full

Then I don't hunger

I don't like the kill

But I partake in what's left

Realizing I too love the kill

and to...

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I once had a heart

Full of life and love

Then it became broken

Time healed and mended you

Your rehab was complete

Then injury claimed you

You seemed hopefull

Then gave up, said you couldn't do this

It wasn't possible

Then you left me

Empty, Solemn , Void

There was hope, no matter how flawed it may be

It wasn't enough to hold you near

Now I stand alone

No r...

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