Lord Howell (Silly Auld Fracka)

by John Coopey

Thursday 1st August 2013 7:44 pm

(apologies for the accent)

Lord Howell’s a Tory who lives in the south

A silly auld fracker wi’ an ignorant mouth

Accustomed to echoing government lies

How much must it hurt him to apologise?

He’s Lord Howell of Guildford, a twat and a peer

And you will have noticed that he’s not from round here.

I’ll tell ye’s Lord Howell for what it is worth

Aboot wor plain folks in the desolate north

Wor don’t hae much wealth but wor rich in wor pride

Wor salt of the earth and wor golden inside.

He’s Lord Howell of Guildford, a twat and a peer

And you might have noticed that he’s not from round here.

Noo reet from the start wor will blatantly state

Wor na’s diddly squat on this fracking debate

But one thing’s for sure wor abundantly clear

Wor divn’t need Howell on the Tyne or the Wear

He’s Lord Howell of Guildford, a twat and a peer

And you will have noticed that he’s not from round here.

Comments

Cate Greenlees

Mon 5th Aug 2013 15:29

And to make matters worse the fracking w....r meant here on the Lancashire coast!! As if explaining that made it all right! Like Harry so eloquently puts it, " let him frack off and frack in his own back yard" and may subsidy be upon all he owns!
Cate xx

M.C. Newberry

Sun 4th Aug 2013 16:13

I really enjoyed this - but add my ha'porth as a southerner for all the slights and rebuffs from "the north". :-))
If it weren't for the need to waste time in "the north"
Defeating those pests - like Duke William: Viking,
King Harold and his foot-wearies had to set forth
Down to Hastings where they would have won to their liking.
And our England would have been free of French rule,
With their avaricious aristos greedy and cruel.
For a thousand years she's been paying the price
For the defeat of King Harold - forced to fight
TWICE!
("North" is a frame of mind as well as a location and I include all those north of Watford - especially any boasting of Viking DNA...frack 'em all - so there!!)

Harry O'Neill

Fri 2nd Aug 2013 14:27

Who does this cheeky fracker think he`s fracking-well talking about? Let him frack off and frack in his own fracking back-yard.

(Mind, thinking about all that money floating about in those fracking frack-wells in America I`m not so fracking sure)

I feel better already.

John Embley

Fri 2nd Aug 2013 13:52

Why, man, Cushie Butterfield'd tek yer tiv hor heart for that try, John! Well done, marrer!

Greg Freeman

Thu 1st Aug 2013 23:17

Magnificent stabs at the accents, John, with your geography almost matching Lord Howell's on occasions. Apparently, he meant the north-west was desolate, not the north-east. I tell you, I've felt desolate in Guildford at times. (I have, of course, shared this on Facebook. More people need to know of your talents!)

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Lord Howell (Silly Auld Fracka)

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