THREADBARE
You are my needle
I am your thread.
Wher'ere you go
I will be led.
Be wary when
you point the way,
not hearing what
I have to say,
for with your plans
so tightly sewn
you may just find
you've lost the thread
to end up all alone.
Comments
<Deleted User> (18118)
Thu 7th Jun 2018 22:02
I always love your work Ray and this one is intriguing and original.
Strong too.
Hannah
Very clever.
Inventive title...inventive theme.
But thinking about some people in this world, the better
alternative might be "alone".
Oh Ray. So damn clever. Your use of 3-beat lines are music to my ryhmers ear. The last catchline could not have been better.
Don ?
Ray,
Thank your this poem which is playful with a clever use of imagery. Thought provoking also.
Keith
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raypool
Thu 7th Jun 2018 23:16
Thanks all of you for welcome comments. I thought of the first lines and just teased the rest out, I suppose. The jist was to offer a warning to those who take our alliance and compliance for granted, often where one partner may be the dominant. I have seen much of this in marriages - my wife and I are acutely aware of any liberties we might be tempted to take with each other and make it something to be avoided at all costs.
Thanks Keith, Don, Anya, Tony(point well made), Mark, Hazel and Hannah !
Love to all. Ray