The  Wonder  of  Me

When no one at all can understand me

When everybody says I’m wrong

I have the hope that finds redemption

I’ve got the strength to carry on

And I’m always there to save the world

Like the messiah I must be

But that’s the wonder

The wonder of me!

And when I shine, the world gets brighter

I have more power than the...

Read and leave comments (1)

Love  Hope

I’ve cleaned out my intestines and dried them with a towel

But despite all these fine efforts I’ve an unsanitary bowel

I take all the precautions, I’ve smoothed out all the gaps

But I know that in the morning my rectum will prolapse

I’ve tried all kinds of treatments and used a range of lotions

Still the rumblings never cease, nor do the perpetual ...

Read and leave comments (2)

Fuck  Cunt

In yonder days of old when the dinosaurs did roam

A lustful circus monster tossed up a mucus foam

An audience stood laughing, the creature showed no fear

It kept on at its business ‘til the ejaculate was clear

The angry mob then settled, the nervous folk dispersed

They thought the monster beaten, they thought his bag had burst

But the creature ...

Read and leave comments (0)

The maiden lay a-sleeping

Her body warm and tender

It was that of a female

Indeed that was her gender

The evil one did spy her

As she did softly doze

He pulled out his red hanky

And blew more than his nose

The fair maiden kept on dreaming

Of beautious wonders hence

Whilst Satan eyed her lustily

His nerves becoming tense

He pulled out his stiff penis

And hoped she would not wa...

Read and leave comments (1)

Read and leave comments (2)

Read and leave comments (6)

Broken Wind

I can't say I've been perfect

I know that I've sinned

But despite all my faults

I have not broken wind

I may have been naughty

And buzzed like a bee

But these terrible vapours

Have not come from me

So forgive me, my darling

And admit what is true

That these nasal offences

Were committed by you!

Read and leave comments (4)

JESUS CHRIST : THE REAL MAN

Jesus was a gnostic atheist who preached the simple truth

All us bastards only joke our dad was God's spilt juice

Jesus didn't think anyone would be stupid enough to take him seriously

But fundamental retards somehow found a twist deliriously

It's time for us to see Christ's point and get the virgin birth jape

His mother, Mar...

Read and leave comments (3)