I tried to inspire myself enough to write something witty

It was no use

my brain was bone dry-robbed of any and every idea brave enough to make its way to the page

I wondered if this madness would ever end or if i should continue on the path of barreness

I felt empty and the air refused to fill my lungs

At some point the words will find me or I will die trying to write. 

Read and leave comments (1)

It made sense of course

To bleed after you’ve fallen down

But I never fell

I simply basked in the pain and torment that left me rotting beneath the moon

It ate me alive- All that I felt and all that I didn’t

I was drained of all things

Good and bad

Especially love

Entirely hollow from the inside out

And now I believe I must die

On this frozen December ground

With m...

Read and leave comments (1)

I remember parts of my childhood and feel ashamed
Or possibly its not the shame that I feel, but a sense of loss, grief, a slight wish I could go back there- just for a moment,  to prove it all in fact was more than just a fever dream.
To fix the broken pieces of myself that I never should have lost in the first place.
But I can't
I must leave the past how it is and feel the tears pour down my...

Read and leave comments (1)

How cruel one must be to become well acquainted with suffering and still inflict pain upon

another

Perhaps my heart is so frozen I forgot how to act.

I am cold and distant, full of disdain and heartache.

A lifetime of resentment runs through these veins

Yet it’s me who bares the ache of caring-but careless in many attempts

The salt of life is but a bitter taste of irony

And so...

Read and leave comments (4)

Naked-It’s the most vulnerable state to be. 
So I undressed myself 
The bed Is the most comforting place to be when you have nowhere else to go
So I pulled back the covers and wept 
I wept for all the art I hadn’t made 
I wept for the brokenness inside 
For my brother
For the waste that has been my twenties 
And all the things I may never get to do 
I wept because I was numb and because I...

Read and leave comments (2)

He wasn’t a regular specimen of a boy, he was a rarity and I could feel the sun and stars and everything in between when he looked at me. 

He was nothing but a stranger

Yet somehow his face felt familiar 

There was a song in his eyes 

But I fail to recall the words 

For he's stolen every thought that has ever bothered to exist from my head

It was quite evident that adventure wasn...

Read and leave comments (0)

There’s this movie I watched as a child. It's deeply sad and the themes are heavy, but an eight year old with a bag of liquorice wouldn’t be the wiser. After that day in the theater it became my favorite movie. I still watch it from time to time and even as the tears begin to fall something about it makes me feel whole. I think that's because I resonate so deeply with the two main charac...

Read and leave comments (0)

No man had ever ignited a flame strong enough to spark my soul. The greatest thing a man has ever done for me was crush my heart- so much so that I couldn't help but write and with such fierce vigor it nearly brought me to death.
He drove me mad and that is where I found real passion.  

Read and leave comments (0)

She thought for a bit
Maybe trees never really could speak and hide in seek was only game not a story to be written
Could it be that all the while it was just in her head
Maybe by happenstance they got lost in the woods and nothing ever happened otherwise.
Was it a fever dream or Perhaps her imagination was far too complex
And without knowing any better she ran wild
Playing along
We'll neve...

Read and leave comments (1)

I came back in time to see the apples change color. 
Shades of crimson dripped from such delicious skin, only to be left to dream amongst the branches
Too majestic to eat
I waited for the feeling to return but it was buried so deep I no longer could find it. 
So I poured myself some coffee and forced the pen upon the page
In search for the words once again. 
I ponder here 
Still waiting 
B...

Read and leave comments (0)

I'd write you a poem if only I knew how
The words I need to say gets stuck inside somehow
You haven't much use for poetry
Since you're young and foolish now
But one day
You'll live to remember everything you wish to forget
I remember you small
Full of speed
Knee deep in grass wallowing in your own laughter
I suppose that's all behind us
Since then you've figured out the world isn't so ki...

Read and leave comments (3)

I remember the days...
Trapped inside despair
I hid within
A blur of grunge aesthetic
The darkness dared to carry me away
My life became a heap of drunken misery
I wasted most nights away with tear soaked remedies in hope that your face would dissipate from memory. 

Read and leave comments (0)

In moments of desperation I consider him
It's not at all that I want him
Not really anyway
And it's not that I don't
He's a fascinating shade I've never seen before, like honey
I think maybe it's that I'm completely irrational and I crave someone
Someone who would be enamored by all I have to say
And he is entirely enamored
That's only half the problem
You see
Without words I render myse...

Read and leave comments (0)

I drank from your lips and tasted your soul
A delicacy that must be savored
Tension crawls through the sheets the way oxygen builds in my lungs
And with each breath I wished I’d die, because every second without you is a waste.

Read and leave comments (0)

She cried to a song that lived in her soul
There's a thousand way to sing it, but none of them seem to fit
Love made a mockery of her fragile heart
Yet somehow she survives
Was it the sacred words she rehearsed so long ago that caressed the ache upon every scar-
Or something more?
She'd never tell
Instead she turned her face to the wind and smiled something hopeful.
"Hold on till May." 

Read and leave comments (0)

In her garden she wasn't alone
The wind was her compass and the dirt was her soul
Birds sang
Trees wept
All that surrounded her made her feel at home.


-Happy Earth Day! 🌱

Read and leave comments (1)

I'm alive when the strong smell of coffee welcomes my senses.
It is enough to bring me to me feet and forget my slumber
Such a bitter aftertaste washes my tongue
Through sleepy eyes and clouded thoughts, it is the most wonderful thing to behold.
True love is cream and sugar swirling in a mug
I'm not Lorelai Gilmore but I do declare myself an addict of piping hot caffeine. 

Read and leave comments (2)

My hands are not my own
When I stare down at them it is not my flesh that bleeds.
It is the skin of someone different entirely.
I've become an alter ego of sorts, wrestling with my anger until provoked by a whisper. This identity I carry is far beyond my control.

If I were to rid myself of it then I'd find myself all alone. 

Read and leave comments (1)

I want to crack
I want the sadness that so desperately clings to my soul to seep through and dissipate.
That is the only way I'll survive; by breaking. 

Read and leave comments (4)

I’m falling ever so slowly my heartbeat dissipates with every passing second

Every thought is about him 

Every breath is wasted if he’s not around 

His words leave me thirsty, begging for pointless rambling so that my soul may be quenched. 

What a feeling it is to be alive

Is this what the beginning of love is like?

Read and leave comments (0)

I'm dead

My bones rusted long ago

I'm not ashamed of what I've done

Just who I am 

I've become a nightmare

Screaming in my sleep 

Doesn't anyone hear me anymore? 

Am I so insignificant?

or am I just alone? 

Read and leave comments (1)

After a while I saw myself and how miserable I’d become. 

I didn’t like it, I didn’t like the discomfort it brought me or the inner conflict that always seemed to scream. 

But that is my world. 

What a harsh reality. 

Read and leave comments (0)

I stared long and hard at the tea stained mug in front of me
Remembering my age whilst pondering untouched thoughts
New life
The idea overwhelms me but not entirely so that I'm repulsed.
I've never considered myself a maternal being, I'm hardly the type.
My soul feels otherwise, she craves the journey, she longs to nurture. I carry so much love only for it all to go to waste.
I'm young but g...

Read and leave comments (2)

The October sky caved in all around me,
Like a blanket without contact.
I stood stagnant in the dark, aware and somehow unafraid of all that lurked among the darkness.
If I ran now there would be no escaping the guilt, but if not now then I never would. 

Read and leave comments (0)

Sometimes it doesn't go away, it finds the audacity to linger in unexpected places.
In some of my greatest moments I find it damn hard to fully embrace the goodness because a part of me still aches. 

It always will. 

Read and leave comments (0)

There was anger within her, ages old, beyond the state of corruption.
Bitterness was rooted deep into her being, living as if it was comfortable there.
She began to grieve and grieve until it became impossible to feel anything else. She tore herself apart in the name of despair, feeling the agony as it fed off her bones.
She'd cry if only she knew how
"Would it always be this way?" She wondere...

Read and leave comments (0)

It’s time I fall in love again, she said to herself, but with words that insist on being heard despite their grandest efforts to be hidden away. You see, With a heart so heavy and a head so full I could bury it all between the pages. 

Read and leave comments (1)

It’s been a long twenty four hours, the kind that involves relentless sobbing and thoughts of rash decision making. I hadn’t intended for the day to end that way but my bottled up emotions demanded my attention. It isn’t easy faking it all the time, but I can’t walk around like a basket case, I have a decent amount of dignity left, I must savor it. 

I witnessed a version of myself I didn’t like...

Read and leave comments (0)

I wander through my garden, in search for inspiration or something greater, but unfortunately the season has been slow and many of my plants are struggling.
Like myself, a withering sunflower in the July heat.
Regardless of my uncertainty the sun still rises, unphased.
I watch my wildflowers sway with the breeze, looking something like a painting.
I sit cross legged now in the dirt, mud absorb...

Read and leave comments (2)

You see, the world is not so small that I'm unable to forget you, it’s the fact that I once was happy and in my happiest moments there was you. 

Read and leave comments (0)

There used to be some sort of magic whenever I visited and never would I expect that the feeling would wear off. Now as an adult (hardly.)  I ponder, at what point do our imaginations stop overflowing? In our years when do we quit producing wonderful fiction into our everyday realities? As twenty-four withers by I wish I could still time, just momentarily so my unique soul can capture whats left. ...

Read and leave comments (0)

It’s safe to say that I’m not okay

The present moment brought pain and stole my breath

Tears clouded my eyes 

Nothing is as it was and will never be again 

Time changes everything and then keeps on changing 

Photographs are just memories, bottled up, a reminder that we can never go back

So we hold onto each one until death do us part. 

And that is all for today. 

Read and leave comments (1)

I remember a girl who was scared to live 

Insecurity ate at her soul 

The only thing keeping her alive were her dreams 

Inside she kept a secret key 

And each night when it became too hard to breathe she’d disappear 

Living like her reality was something greater 

One day she became a woman and faced her deepest fears, she watched them start to fall away

Determined, she decided...

Read and leave comments (3)

Somehow the story continues as I hold on and look, Here we are, like something unbreakable. The sweet taste of summer teases the tip of my tongue. I've dreamt of feeling alive for some time now, I believe finally a change is on its way. Restlessly I'll wait, barely breathing, just savoring each passive moment of my life while it still lasts. I stare into the sun Bleeding tears now as I w...

Read and leave comments (1)

The wild in me returned

Not that it was ever capable of fully leaving.

I am a woman not like any other, I am wildly my own.

Freckled, small and passionately strange

I swore I'd never come back from the depths of the desert where I lost all I had ever known, but the universe swallowed all of my doubts as my soul swallowed the sun.

'Little queen', that's what the wind calls me, she sp...

Read and leave comments (4)

(Another overdue piece.) 

Isolation has its perks

For example; I've begun to make friends with the stars, when they decide to show their faces that is.

Now that this sweater weather is about over I'm able to dream in color.

Picking up hints of green wherever I go

It's a stale world from my point of view, everyone and everything I see is devoid of substance.

I wanted growth b...

Read and leave comments (2)

(A very overdue piece. )

No inspiration or affection or thought of any kind brushed my path.
I hated it so
I watched the sky melt into a thousand shades of grey, dismal prayers planted in the clouds.
From beneath saturated dreams I wander, dying to leave this world behind.
Is it just the cold or am I only one caught in a sleep state?
My tired eyes hesitate to see the truth, if I ignore the...

Read and leave comments (0)

The way you look at me is sacred 
I’m fighting the moment as it happens
So slow it’s almost painful 
I wish you’d leave 
Sip your pink lemonade elsewhere 
But there’s some sort of magic behind your eyes
And I wonder if you know
Certainly the mirror has told you 
Or does it keep secrets? 
Your calloused fingers remind me of my favorite song 
I choke on the thought of getting close 
Maybe...

Read and leave comments (0)

I'm in love with a man
And there's not a thing to do about it
For I hear it's a scandalous crime to fall for the deeply committed.

Read and leave comments (1)

Wild woman,

When did your soul become so restless?

Has the thought of giving up occupied your head?

Isn't it you who sat beneath the moon claiming no finger could ever grace your slin, not a man could tame such a spirit?

Don't be fooled by this troubling drought

You see, 

flowers only wither if they are dead. 

Read and leave comments (0)

Oh Sad little soul,
The searing pain which tears you from your body is only a moment, it is just a small molecule? Of time.
Even though the anguish feels like years of Neverending , it will come to an end.
Yes, there will be a day where the sun ignites before your eyes, forever golden.
Shadows will play like Peter and Wendy
And you my friend 
Will feel okay again
I promise. 
 

Read and leave comments (1)

When I am older I hope to write about endless summers and sweet kisses in between
There must be a silver lining written somewhere in poetry
I’d like a vibrant sun to rain upon my skin and shower me with flecks of happiness
I want to be lost in laughter, drowning in bliss
How unfortunate the human condition is that I, a fragile soul, should have to die before I live.
Possibly the unknown is th...

Read and leave comments (3)

On May 1st
 

Once a year I celebrate the anniversary of a song I heard some time long ago
It lives inside these hollow bones,
And when I’m feeling quite lonely I let the sounds wash over me until I feel it breathing me back
to life.
In a moment of absolute static I disappear.
Forever I will relish in it’s sweet irony, rewinding the journey in my mind
I reflect on the last year and how th...

Read and leave comments (2)

I've always dreamt of being a storyteller.
One who devotes their life to the art of telling stories by spilling their soul upon a blotted page.
When I was much younger I could tell you of the many adventures that took my imagination for a spin.
I thought by now I'd have seen more than this town that no longer serves me, I believed there would be far more beauty than heartache and ink letters re...

Read and leave comments (0)

Now that I'm completely lost I've no more desire to return. Im deeply wrought with guilt that it seems I've forgotten the way home- But home was never a place anyhow, it was merely a state of mind and for now it's somewhere I can no longer find. 

Read and leave comments (1)

Since I was young I watched you and learned-I learned things of use and things that feed my soul. You gave me my name and showed me to add, You taught me to laugh and hold my tongue, how to use a hammer and swing a bat.
My favorite things remind me of you
If it wasn't for your tough love I don't know where I'd be
Who I am is because of you
I look in the mirror and I see you
Now I watch you an...

Read and leave comments (7)

Some say she arrived from hell with flaming hair and a devilish grin.

Her eyes flashed misery in such a captivating way

It was enough to torture the most upright of men

Yet somehow they always returned, 

 Surrendering their hearts for more. 

Read and leave comments (1)

She’s at home tonight

Pacing wood floors

Wondering when 

Mechanical thoughts emerge from her subconscious 

There must be a way to endure all this solitude 

Delicate fingers caress the knob of an old radio 

Piece by piece her broken heart crawls through her skin 

The music gets louder as she tears herself apart 

Haunting screams from within fill the void of absolute nothingn...

Read and leave comments (0)

I met my lowest moment and became one with the darkest parts of me.

I was fragile, weak, broken beyond repair.

Life was an annoyance and breathing was just a chore.

It felt as if I couldn’t fathom such pain any longer until I came face to face with skies of blue-

Once again a reminder that hope lives.

I do believe it to be found in the daring colors of the sunset, the subtle whisper...

Read and leave comments (0)

I wanna dance to the sound of fiddles in the wind on a rainwashed Sunday wearing nothing but a mudstained hat upon my fiery head.

Read and leave comments (2)