Explain the unexplainable. 

Tell me, Mom. How did that black tar feel when submerging under your skin?

Tell me — did the bruises left behind 

All over your forearm and thigh

Cause you pain to the touch?

Did those traces of every time you used 

Haunt you when you glanced at them?

Tell me of the astounding rush,

Perhaps being the sensation

That was your remedy for pain,

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To the boy

whom I love

more than anything:

You are so perfect to me

and for me.

I am completely in love

with the person you are.

I am completely in love

with with they way I catch your blue eyes gazing at me.

with our after-hours jam sessions in your Ford.

with your intelligence and your yearn to build yourself a future.

with your love for and admiration of yo...

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You tucked me in 

and stripped me of my clothing.

I couldn't move.

You grasped my torso and groped my groin.

I couldn't move.

You dismissed my demands to stop 

and plunged your fingers into me.

I couldn't move.

You exposed yourself

so that our bare, naked skin could touch.

I couldn't move.

You smothered me and kissed my neck.

Your penis penet...

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You disrespected my wishes,

invaded me of my body,

and introspectively damaged me.

This all coming from the man 

whom I used to believe to be my first love.

You always wander back,

returning full of apologies and excuses,

begging for forgivefulness.

You raped me of my dauntlessness.

I owe you nothing -

not a single chance more,

not a single thought.

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Too often I lose myself
contemplating which way is the best.
I consider each technique's effects and attempt to create the physical feeling associated with each scenario by painting a vivd image of what my bodily reaction may be.

It's painful to know I think of such pain.
But too often I lose myself
fantasizing of the sensation my body'd endure by my Soul's abandonment of the Flesh.
I imag...

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Have faith

not in superficial distractions that only temporarily satisfies, 

but that you can seek and receive everlasting forgiveness and love from our God.

Have faith

not in your own faith,

but in the greatness of our God.

Have faith 

in the size,

in the strength,

in the power of our God.

Have faith,

despite doubt.

-- Be strong, grow from life's most ardu...

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We used to be a complete family.

There was once four of us.

But then,

the seventeen year old took his life

and it broke my mother's heart.

She suffered so severely 

and then

my mother lost her life to drugs

and it broke my heart.

There was once four of us,

but now,

we're an aching family of two.

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I'm angry you left me.

You missed my graduation.

You weren't there for my biggest heartbreak. 

You weren't here for my most agonizing days of high school.

You left me alone to take care of Dad

and myself.

You're not here to see my years of college.

You never met the boy.

You won't be attending my wedding.

My children will never know you.

You told me you felt like a fa...

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She used to be so inncent.

Her world was so effortless, so high-spirited, so painless.

Tragedy transformed an adolescent into a mature and aching young woman 

in the blink of an eye.

She's seen her blood turned cold 

by the grasp of a rope

at eight years young.

She's buried her mother

as an expense of heroin

a month after her sixteenth birthday.

She's been tortured by...

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