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Riverside Inn

At the riverside inn she solemnly sips at cider;

auburn draped over the face bent to a book.

A welcome wave, he's slow to recognise her,

as if he cannot quite believe his luck.

"You one or two?" the waitress speaks pidgin English.

"We one or two?" he repeats with a quizzical air.

The waitress sighs and silently curses the British -

"We one!" she giggles and pulls him on to her chair.

 

Darkness descends on the jive and the jazz,

squeezing the space stretched before them.

There's a rustle of wings and a jingle of brass

and he leans to the face shaped by autumn.

 

A moonlighted singer rasps out a weatherbeat warning;

she moans there's no emptiness equal to that of the blues.

The forlorn heads flag, the dolorous drums are calling

the current that pulls along when you've nothing to lose.

She points at the swans bobbing and gliding in tune;

the riverboats cruise and overhung branches break,

or quiver and shake their fist at reflections of moon.

She giggles and ripples of happiness emanate.

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Comments

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David Cooke

Sun 19th Dec 2010 10:47

HI Ray Thought it was about time I caught up with some of yours. I must say that The Riverside Inn' Is beautifully cadenced with a wry touch of humour.

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Ray Miller

Sat 18th Dec 2010 11:46

Thanks very much, Isobel and John. You're lucky to have all these poetry nights. Next to nowt down here.Had to look up dactyl, thought it were an extinct reptile.

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John Coopey

Fri 17th Dec 2010 20:07

This is my kind of stuff, Ray. Love it, especially the dactyls in the bridge.

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Isobel

Fri 17th Dec 2010 08:07

Lovely - reminds me of the Tudor last night - love bursting and blooming all over the place! It's nice to be reminded that it does exist!

I shall have to return at a later date to see if there is anything I can critique you on ;) - for now I just enjoyed reading it. xx

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Ray Miller

Thu 16th Dec 2010 22:45

Thanks ever so much for your kind words everyone.I'm kinda surprised at the praise, though this is about the seventh incarnation of this poem so it should have got better by now!

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Dave Bradley

Thu 16th Dec 2010 15:07

Lovely. Lots of loose ends in the story to tease the imagination

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Laura Taylor

Thu 16th Dec 2010 13:59

Mmmm...some beautiful lines that stand out for me here...'auburn draped over the face bent to a book/and he leans to the face shaped by autumn.' As a ginge myself, I would like to thank you for championing one of us ;)

Made me feel like being wrapped in a big warm hug, this. Lovely.


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Lynn Dye

Thu 16th Dec 2010 12:50

Beautiful and uplifting, Ray, enjoyed this very much. x

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Greg Freeman

Thu 16th Dec 2010 11:00

One of your best, Ray. I know I say that quite often but ... I particularly liked the stuff with the waitress. That really gave it life.

<Deleted User> (6895)

Thu 16th Dec 2010 10:27

what a pile of....what poetry is really all about..beautiful!

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Rachael Dunn

Thu 16th Dec 2010 10:00

Really enjoyed this Ray,'he leans to the face shaped by autumn' beautiful line,lightness throughout. :)

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Ann Foxglove

Thu 16th Dec 2010 09:28

I love your subtle rhymes and rythms. A delicate poem. Enjoyed!

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