A Monkey wore pink lipstick
as he laughed and baked a cake
and was followed round the kitchen by a disco dancing snake, 
they were joined by a Rhino who was wearing underpants, shuffling his bum and joining in the dance,
then there came a Chicken who was roaring like a bear as and a skateboarding Elephant with long curly hair. 

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my hat fell off one day

my head stayed on and so did my hair

heads are designed not to fall off

hats are made for heads

hats fall off

some fall off

wedding guest hats are not secure 

they flatten hair styles

the wind might decide to be cruel that day

is this a risk you are willing to take?

no one wants to lose a wedding hat

no one wants hat hair

my advice if you...

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1.      The Queen

Pussy cat, pussy cat

Where have you been?

Hiding under your car

Where I can’t be seen

Pussy cat, pussy cat

Where have you been?

Digging up next doors garden

Leaving proof of where I have been

Pussy cat, pussy cat

Where have you been?

Tried to get a train to London

But no joy, didn’t have a bean

Pussy cat, pussy cat

Whe...

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Oi heid the baw
Noo wit's the matter?
Don't greet aboot
Ma dodgy patter.
Jist gies a winch
Behind the wa'
I swear a wulny
Tell yer maw.
Al huv' ye hame
the back a ten
So how's aboot
A smooch then hen?

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