My Muse
The chaos in my mind
is killing me,
my life, a bad trip
on LSD
a rush to the brain,
serotonin, dopamine
all at once shining
blue light
a mind so open,
a heart so full,
peace,
such peace,
the sweetest sleep.
Memories are mirages,
I cannot reach.
A sinking feeling,
a dread inside around I go,
again and again,
down the rabbit hole,
just once more,
one last time
looking for a ...
Tuesday 7th November 2017 5:03 am
Once
I don't know my way,
I've always walked blind,
dazed by the light,
bound to the dark,
heart tattered and torn,
mind vacant and worn.
The soul had a song once
but I lost it in the fog.
Alone now,
I wander
forever forlorn,
the bird long flown,
my hope echoing blue
shatters on the sun.
©JM.Cole
Saturday 4th November 2017 11:20 am
Poem in Progress F
My heart dances
the sun yearns for cloud
the blue in my orbit
so big so loud
nothing no more
standing in my way now
they left the offering in the green
black and blue, yellow too
my golden vision
from the desert to the wood I run
there's a dog in the cloud
and the moon is full and bright
loud I see all the colour
flickers flickers flickers blue
purple red too
a full ...
Saturday 28th October 2017 12:00 am
Poem in Progress E
Sometimes you just have to
throw your cards
against the wind
and watch where they land
six plus five is eleven
shows me where to dive
how to jump
blind
deep inside
the mirror behind
the future a wall
blank
white
tall.
©JM. Cole
Sunday 22nd October 2017 7:07 am
Same
All my days are like mud.
Birth is the gateway to hell.
I been standing
most my life on the edge.
Alienation in a world of same.
©JM.Cole
Sunday 22nd October 2017 7:00 am
Ice
Angel to ghost
I go
alone
the night cold
heavy heart torn
rain hails bones
brutal ache my mistake
always alone
always alone
trying trying
to go back in time
to a place in my mind
paradise denied
burning inside
blue ice fire
cracks a pain so deep
only sounds like these
evoke awake demons
buried brittle knees
signal transmits
a radio waves
echo cellos past
...
Saturday 14th October 2017 5:25 am
SoulBlind
doesn't really matter anymore
which one I follow
soul blinded my heart
cracks like a cello
my art melts
absently full
tipping flipping
upside down
and back in on itself
all the walls melt away
dreams obliterate my fate
with destiny I dance
take my chance
in the black of night
nobody ever
really holds your hand right.
I write every night
like it's...
Wednesday 11th October 2017 4:03 am
Poem in Progress B (explicit)
I see the star I do not run
I fall apart I come undone
I live for it
the rain the burn
the everlasting storm
a rush a drug
a hurricane of pure
fucking love.
I never met a siren
didn't drag me out to the deep
I drowned a few times
came back whole complete
from under the sea
now I tie a rope to the lighthouse
and swim when I please
when I get the need
I dig my grave
...
Tuesday 3rd October 2017 2:08 am
A Poem in Progress
I stare straight into the sun
a rock doesn't in the river run
unlike the witch
I sink like a stone
unknown
cold
alone
as in the beginning
numb
to my existence
lost
in oblivion
a round a square
to triangle crowned
no coming back
the clown drowns
there is no sound
out in the clouds
upside down
hanging on a frown
my colour fogs
to a clay like brown
I whistle...
Tuesday 26th September 2017 6:11 am
Red
My head is full of numbers,
my heart is full of dread
if I go from black to blue
all the rhymes
will come out new.
Red bleeds to yellow
and all the numbers are blue
the three comes in threes and
makes the nine incomplete and
the moon tells the secrets
I'm not meant to keep
it's a message of the future
and the past complete.
A half yellow star sharp
pierces my art.
The ...
Thursday 21st September 2017 5:39 pm
SunBeams
I miss the rush,
the release,
my dopamine,
my beautiful heroine
addicted to you,
I never felt so blue.
It was inevitable
that I would lose
lost in the hues of my
perfect muse.
Intoxicated in your mist
searching out my sweet bliss,
hoping for anything but
indifference.
Be my nepenthe
and chase away the sorrow
that leaves me so hollow.
My chemical high,
my sweet ...
Wednesday 20th September 2017 6:14 pm
Tunneled
There's a tunnel of light
inside my mind
through which I travel
when the black rain falls loud
is the sound of my soul
hollowing out
a fragment in time
behind the lines I seek
to define the being inside
the feeling that's leaving
my heart is racing
my vacant brain is aching
for all the mistakes I'm making,
the art I'm forsaking,
everything on fire
blazing.
©JM.Cole
Sunday 17th September 2017 5:45 am
Leaves
It's just a memory
of a feeling I feel always
when the leaves are leaving
the air slows cold
wet wind smells low.
Lonely is the season.
©JMCole
Thursday 14th September 2017 12:22 pm
Orangeblue
Going to die if I can't write
the moon is falling falling
out the sky time is blind
the night flies by,
wind screams sin,
a howling white oblivion
time time time
ticks ticks ticks
tick tock
tick tock
dust to rock to dust
drops
partial particles
squared and triangled
falling fearless
into the blue
I follow the rainbow
rabbit skips
the echo drips
upside down
...
Wednesday 6th September 2017 10:26 pm
Thud
Time is infinite now
music carries the essence
of a soul like an echo inside
repeating rhythmically
drumming through history
thud thud thud comes the love
blue red is my blood
blue was the colour
I caught from above
like a train in my brain
acid rain stains colour
reclaims the lights flash
either side a fairground ride
alive inside my mind
feels always like
I'm crashing...
Thursday 31st August 2017 3:00 am
WordPlay
Am I as impalpable as I imagine myself
or am I verdant and sarcastic,
opposites of what I should aspire to be?
We all have our dragon to slay;
I have many.
My mind is as a billabong,
backed up with emotion,
I cannot control.
Pain stretches like rivers
into deep green fields,
I'm so isolated in my misery
I can feel the mistral of Southern France
on my saffron coloured face...
Wednesday 30th August 2017 11:37 am
PaperMate (explicit)
I am my own best friend,
me and my burning pen.
Together alone
through everything
we have been,
my papermate and I
find myself, I lose my way,
I lose myself, I find my way,
I come back around again
then square I go,
alone.
Cut the nose, spite the face,
I got pride, I got space,
not a number, not a mistake.
Slave never
a sheep black as me
so black I am the light,
...
Thursday 24th August 2017 10:47 am
Blunt
Your words are hollow,
your words I swallow,
time and time again
even after
action did not follow,
I still swallowed
and in return
every piece I gave,
my soul, my heart,
my disturbing brain
and you just left me
standing in the rain
carrying my pain
so dismayed I caved
into shame.
The rage a blunt stain
upon the page.
©JMCole
Sunday 20th August 2017 2:20 pm
Scattered Matter
Pitter patter
the heart does shatter.
Mad as a hatter
but it don't matter.
Manic but not yet scattered.
Battered, tattered, flat,
I matter.
You matter, I matter,
we all matter eh
even under the rain
still washing off our stains.
Matters matters matters
that we still feel the pain
of our souls pitter pattering on
down the drain.
©JMCole
Wednesday 16th August 2017 8:00 pm
Clay
Walking along
listening to the birdsong
dancing on the wind
a seagull flew by
look to the right
tree in the sky
makes me feel alright.
Spin the wheel,
the sandman steals
sometimes
the leaves deceive,
blinded by the green
the ocean dreams
three little trees
one full seed,
black and blue
inbetween the green
a reddened hue.
Eleven points in tact,
the lights, t...
Friday 11th August 2017 9:07 pm
Amber
I’ll meet you at sunrise
in a past life.
Amber moon burns the sky,
I await dawn,
the changing light.
I think of you and I smile inside.
Deep with passion,
you make me feel so alive.
©JMCole
Monday 7th August 2017 7:40 pm
Retreat
A storm is coming
and I can't sleep.
I can feel the deep
lapping at my feet.
Tides tease
waves black and violent
breathe, plead
come inside take a peek.
I think I retreat
go back
hide in the trees
where the owl
steals my dreams
and the grass
colours everything green.
Not all is
always as it seems
in between lies
the true heart of things.
©JM.Cole
Sunday 23rd July 2017 11:13 am
Rust
Lost in the summer haze
still filtering out those greys,
still absent in waste,
vacant in change
rearranging my stain
an inherent pain
displaced
the colour
drips,
drips,
drips.
My bones leak into my soul,
the mud absorbs everything
but the flow
and the black fog
still follows me home.
The desert can be bleak
especially when the colour
constantly leaks
and the sa...
Monday 19th June 2017 3:00 pm
Still
I been sleeping under the ocean,
drowning in emotion,
mind empty and slowing,
sound but a commotion
too loud without meaning.
Time passes silent still
all my words desert me
when I lose my will.
Tired of climbing
the same sodden hill.
It rains and it hails
and the sun comes
in and out of view.
The smell is old but new,
the memory evades
but the pain, still
cuts rig...
Sunday 18th June 2017 6:45 pm
Mystic Blue
I think of you my ocean view,
my sweet sunrise,
my mystical moonlight blue.
I think of you all the time,
all the while
drowning in my sleep.
You drive me crazy
with your absence.
You drive me crazy
with your presence.
I love the chaos you bring,
leaves me incomplete,
open, breakable.
The less you give,
the more I want.
The more you give,
all I want.
I long for ...
Sunday 11th June 2017 9:37 pm
Golden Hues
Can't write a line for the fire
burning in my mind.
An ocean of flames,
she ignites inside.
A passion so deep,
I thought long ago died.
I buried it down
and now it does rise.
I see a beauty in her eyes,
a spark that's hard to define,
even harder to find.
Her smile sets the soul alight
and I bask in the glory
of her perfect light.
When I listen to you read,
such a fee...
Thursday 8th June 2017 10:45 pm
Waiting
I was waiting
for the rain to stop
for the sun to shine
in the rising moon
for a sign
for the light
to set fire
to the rhyme
inside my mind
so I can forget myself
and fall out of time.
©JMCole
Sunday 4th June 2017 12:19 am
Rainbow Dream
Pure gold she is,
pure gold to me,
pure sunlight amber glow,
pure moonlight true blue,
purple green,
pure red, a dream,
pure starlight white,
pure light defined.
So much light
she puts inside,
she glows, it flows,
heart no more dark
shades bend blue.
My soul she does kiss open,
a vast array of colour erupts,
whole inside
she leaves me always
complete ecstasy infin...
Saturday 27th May 2017 11:40 am
Blank
The moon comes
but nothing is all I got.
The trees refuse to speak
and the breeze
no longer heals my pain
like rain
the words would fall
but now nothing,
nothing at all,
blank pages appall.
I look inside,
a grey brick wall
and I wonder
how it got so tall.
©JMCole
Friday 19th May 2017 5:51 pm
Pure Ecstasy
It started out basic,
platonic,
the way any friendship does
but inside each new day
it grew and grew.
Such a burn in my soul
makes my feet itch
and the heart does yearn
to be with you.
So nervous you make me,
ecstatic too.
Makes me so shy,
makes the heart cry,
makes my mind wild,
such a drive inside.
My soul soars
at the sound of your words.
A voice so divine
do...
Friday 12th May 2017 8:54 pm
Night
Don't be afraid of the night,
take the feathers
and follow the light
for in the light we forever fly,
eternally divine,
immortalised through time.
©JMCole
Friday 12th May 2017 1:26 pm
Chaos
She swims the deep blue,
chaos in her heart,
mind a bright spark,
words that shine a light afar.
A fire burning in her soul
as she does not yet know
she's already whole.
Deep as the deepest sea
the deep of her words
speaks to me.
Can't see the forest
for the trees
when I hear her read.
Her voice,
it does
such beautiful things
and I get lost
...Saturday 6th May 2017 12:58 pm
Reverse
Love never captures the stars
for we burn in the hollow
of the black hole
tearing at our souls.
Yearning to be free,
on our knees, we plead,
blind at times in defeat,
deaf to the trees,
the hearts true needs
but on we climb toward the light,
the rainbow an illusion of mind
knowing the journey is the gold,
that truth comes in numbers
and in reverse the future unfolds.
...
Thursday 27th April 2017 12:57 am
Half Moon
One star and half a moon
in the purple sky tonight.
Half a mind, half a heart,
half a soul, half life.
A pain so big inside,
I can’t help but cry
for the hope gone.
For the golden round
lost underground.
The pain feels full
but absent,
present piercing tragic
to me
she was pure magic.
A light that shone
into my heart.
I felt the pull so palpable,
attaching no...
Saturday 22nd April 2017 12:24 am
Will
Feeling low,
absent is my flow,
guilt eats at my bones
and all my wrongs
follow me home.
I've got no will
to do the things
I need to do.
The sun burns me blue,
I can't hear the trees,
the moon always leaves
and my heart does
drown out in the sea.
©JMCole
Thursday 20th April 2017 11:13 pm
Hurricane
You are the sunshine on a cloudy day,
the bright blue sky breaking through
a rainy afternoon.
The only star in my night sky,
illuminating dreams long lost to me.
I'd swim in your ocean
for all of eternity
and be twice as free
as I ever could have perceived.
My mind doesn't wander
at the sound of your voice.
I feel calm.
I feel peace.
I feel at ease.
I think you're swee...
Wednesday 19th April 2017 7:59 pm
Sunday
A cacophony of sound beats around
inside my brain, deafening drops.
Sunday misery breaking the silence
of yesterdays. Rainy Mondays,
no hope for tomorrows.
We come and go. We come and go
when the floodgates of pain are open.
Forgiveness closes doors
left ajar in anger.
Time moves forward,
changes are subtle,
inevitable.
Hope does damage to the living dead.
Alone in...
Sunday 16th April 2017 9:12 am
Rope
I shut it down
when it gets too loud
and I go back
underground.
I feel it like a thud,
dull but hollow,
loud and shallow.
I wallow, I bellow.
I hope, I hope
then I damn the hope
down the hole,
throw the rope.
I’m afraid,
afraid of my brain,
afraid of the rain,
my pain,
the words on the page,
the ever growing rage,
the crushing despair,
the hate.
No mo...
Monday 10th April 2017 5:25 pm
Disillusion
Life is full of illusion,
a process of disillusion.
No perfection in decay.
To die,
to be reborn,
to be all that I am
is eternity.
Oblivion only comes
to those that seek it.
©JMCole
Friday 31st March 2017 9:44 pm
Repeat
Rinse repeat
the soul clean
walk the tightrope
to my dreams
pull apart
my stitches and seams
bleed out the bleak
buries me beneath
drowning in defeat
living on my knees
upside down
the yellow screams
in threes.
©JMCole
Thursday 23rd March 2017 10:36 pm
Wayward
Scream into the night,
my agony, my plight.
With all my might,
I pray,
I beg the lord
to take the pain away,
erase the mistake
that is my brain.
Infectious.
Awkward.
Wayward.
Onward.
Climbing the walls
inside my mind,
a scrambling mist,
the basement of my soul,
my hollow void.
Out of time, out of mind
every path a one way street.
Defeat leads me on,
a dead end,
...
Wednesday 22nd March 2017 1:48 am
Fade to Burn
Sometimes a river,
sometimes an ocean,
a trickle, a flood
a commotion of emotion.
Stars explode into the sun
and the moon does run
undone.
Midnight blue the sky inside
passion and desire,
tornado and lightning
combined.
Open clouds,
rain thunders numbers.
Today I burn
cages and ghosts.
Tomorrow I fade
to grey absent space.
©JMCole
Monday 20th March 2017 5:59 pm
Times Five
The moon comes at me
through the trees,
golden gleaming
picking apart my seams.
The sound it screams
and the colour drowns me
in my dreams,
echoes low
in twos and fours,
infinity comes
through open doors
shaded in cloud,
dim then alive
so bright the shine.
A diamond flickers
five times.
©JMCole
Sunday 19th March 2017 2:45 pm
Repent
Living on borrowed time,
buying happiness on credit.
Can’t pay the debt
when despair comes to call.
When despair comes to call,
I don’t open the door.
Every time I let it in,
leaves me on the floor,
crawling around
in a haunting abyss
sinking lower than low.
I miss the sun
where once I did run.
Can’t stop the flow of low
today, a wave takes me under.
Swim for the s...
Saturday 11th March 2017 6:38 am
Three
The moon burns bright,
the sign comes clouded
upside down I lie awhile
see it straight
a road unto itself
my flaming hell,
my fading oblivion.
Straight down we follow
the glow,
hope
flickers distant
a hollow echo.
The river to the ocean
always flows,
the moon to the sun
I always follow.
I swim the deep,
I lose my feet,
silent are the screams
drowning out my dream...
Friday 10th March 2017 3:30 am
I After Me After I
I followed the moon
into the sun
through the desert heat,
the ocean deep,
the forest evergreen
and into my oblivion.
I saw the future,
I saw the past.
I saw every little piece of me
incomplete
shattered in stars
across the night sky.
A landscape painting
in my mind
forever carved out,
a dream inside.
Past and future collide,
stars align.
The moon fully golden...
Tuesday 7th March 2017 2:49 pm
Drift
Drugs,
self sabotage,
black of night
takes all light.
It snows in wonderland.
I lost my way,
drifted amiss.
The ego took control.
Hope floats,
a distant mess,
somehow less,
never more.
Restart,
begin again,
start anew.
In your view,
my sun shines blue.
©JMCole
Thursday 2nd March 2017 4:10 pm
Constraint
As I look at the moon tonight.
It is full and bright
blue illuminates through
my mind, stars align.
I am fine.
Lately,
I've been burning up inside
my twisted demise,
my dystopia.
Tunnel vision,
lost my mission,
lost my way,
lost my vision.
Each night I sit with silence,
enveloped in despair.
Constrained,
penning lines in my mind,
I fail to keep,
losing too much slee...
Monday 27th February 2017 10:14 am
Drizzle
My heart does scream
at the nothing in my hands.
My hope evaporates slow,
cold my soul floats,
fades absent to grey.
Can't keep on
coming back this way,
howling at the moon
night and day
disarray eating away
my brain, inept
abandons all my dreams.
The nothing consumes,
drizzle soaks right through.
The rain gets inside
my bones they ache,
my life, a waste,
a pi...
Sunday 26th February 2017 1:49 am
Closet Space
I am at my best
when I have nothing left
for there is nothing to lose.
Fear is a coffin,
can bury you alive.
Never be afraid to die
for after life comes the light
and all inside fly.
Life is a journey,
a fucked up maze,
dark dark days
much penance to pay,
happy is in the chase.
Opulence will end you
but death will set you free.
A pure heart does flutter
to the green ...
Friday 17th February 2017 3:29 am
Ablaze
I got poems
in my heart for you
but I can't get them out.
For weeks now
I've been writing you
inside my mind,
playing with the words,
looking for the rhyme.
You stop time
with your eyes
you own me complete
the blue and the green
inside a fury
of colour and dreams.
A maddening desire
you ignite inside,
keeps me up
most nights I can't sleep
because I'm lost in ...
Saturday 11th February 2017 10:01 pm
Echo
Thoughts are heavy
in my head,
feeling a familiar
kind of dread.
The fog crowds,
absorbs all thought.
The half moon hangs low,
echoes a perfect glow.
It's dark inside my heart
when I feel all the parts,
I fall apart.
©JMCole
Tuesday 24th January 2017 7:25 am
Edge
Sometimes I’m here,
others elsewhere,
gone, lost in my head,
a round, a square.
Underground,
disappointment frowns.
At my best always
when there’s nothing left
and all I ever do
is stand on the edge.
©JM.Cole
Sunday 22nd January 2017 1:08 am
Dust
There's no such thing
as crazy is not sickness.
Conformity is suffocation.
The pills kill the light,
all else turns to dust
and in the rain we all rust.
Lift it up,
sweep it under,
show the sun,
no shame, no thunder.
God forbid
the rain should come.
Can't waste time
feeling the pain
pick a box, pick a box
they're all the same.
Grey.
©JMCole
Saturday 21st January 2017 10:49 am
Silver Light
I see the blue purple
when I look
into the blue green.
I see it crystal,
pure and true
and my feeling
comes in like a flood,
pure white
unconditional love.
A bond for life,
no matter the strife.
She’s an angel in my mind,
queen of my wonderland,
captain of my ship
and my stormy sea
she does command.
She’s a shining star
in no man’s land.
She brings to me
the sweetest ...
Saturday 21st January 2017 10:35 am
I Don't Want to Write Tonight
Nothing will ease this ache,
this pain,
this blank space.
My heart lies torn,
so worn.
Words don't help,
my mind a blur,
my sleepless brain,
my feelings of dismay.
All these things
pull me under,
awaken my thunder.
Alone we wonder
and wander
from one star to another
trying in vain
to illuminate the way
but the pain won't go away
no matter
how we pray.
It all comes...
Friday 20th January 2017 4:49 am
Fine
What is fine?
I mean fine.
When we say we are fine,
how fine can we be?
What is it I cannot define
with the word fine?
I am not fine.
I am filled full empty.
I am heavy.
I am hope
less.
Woe is I who is not fine
for I cannot define me.
Only in death will I rise.
I had to die to realise
to be reborn
to come anew.
I kill the self
I don’t wish to be.
I k...
Sunday 1st January 2017 2:51 am
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